Published: Wednesday, May 28, 2008
We need to reawaken our community-building spirit
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My family moved to Indianapolis from the West Coast when I was 5. The Porters moved in next door one year later. My parents lived in that house for 34 years. The Porters are still there.
Mrs. Porter came over in the middle of the night to stay with us kids when my mother went into labor with my baby brother. She invited us for dinner the day a tree fell over in our backyard, taking our electrical wires down with it. She fed our cats when we were away. The day I turned 18, she registered me to vote.
This flood of memories was launched by a YouTube video my sister sent me. It shows Barack Obama campaigning in front of an Indianapolis polling station on the day of the Indiana primary. There right at the start, Obama is shaking hands with Mrs. Porter.
I've been lucky in my neighbors. Like my parents, I've found faithful friends and networks of support across the backyard fence. My sons became best friends with the boys down the street. Those boys' parents and I have shared babysitting, carpools, tools, impromptu dinners and some memorable camping trips. The retired couple across the street has been a reliable source of household advice and garden produce. The next door neighbors cheerfully endured balls, frisbees and boys unexpectedly flying into their yard. And I've always found someone to feed my cat.
Of course, with some neighbors I've never exchanged more than an occasional wave, and others have come and gone barely noticed. Some have had loud parties or noisy dogs. With work, kids, and dark, drizzly winters, it's easy to go months without talking to anyone else on my street. But over the years, when illness, death, criminal activity, earthquake or some other extraordinary event has interrupted the normal patterns of life, my neighbors have banded together and responded as a caring community.
As Americans, we take pride in our independence and our ability to achieve on our own. That streak of rugged individualism is balanced by an equally strong drive to build community that runs through American history and the American character. Pioneer settlers banded together to organize schools, churches and Granges. Neighbors have gathered for barn-raisings and sewing circles. Today still, Americans unite in PTAs, block watches, volunteer fire departments, Habitat for Humanity builds and multiple other ways.
That instinct for pitching in for the common good, side-by-side with people from different generations and different backgrounds, keeps our democracy strong.
Today the community-building side of our American character seems to be dwindling. Television, iPods, attached garages and cell phones keep us in little capsules, in touch with our inner circle, but oblivious to the world around us. Meanwhile driving alone and talk radio nurture an us-against-them attitude.
In the book "Bowling Alone," Robert Putnam documents the sharp decline in Americans meeting face-to-face. From bowling leagues, to civic clubs, to dinners with friends and family, Americans at the dawn of the 21st century get together less often than in decades past. The Internet may be creating new ways of linking up, but virtual connections really aren't the same.
We also move a lot. According to U.S. Census data, about 11 percent of Washington homeowners and 46 percent of renters moved in the previous 15 months. That's a little higher than the national average. Frequent moves not only make it harder for adults to establish community bonds, but also put children at particular risk by disrupting schooling, activities and relationships.
The season of long, light evenings and warmer weather is beginning, when we emerge from our houses and cars, into our yards and neighborhoods. Some summers past, I confess, I've avoided spending too much time chatting with my neighbors as I've rushed to my car or focused on completing outdoor chores. But seeing that YouTube clip of Mrs. Porter has gotten me to make a Memorial Day resolution. This summer I'm going to slow down and take the time to get to know some new neighbors.
Marilyn Watkins, policy director of the Economic Opportunity Instititue (www.eoionline.org), writes every other Wednesday. Her e-mail address is marilyn@eoionline.org.
Mrs. Porter came over in the middle of the night to stay with us kids when my mother went into labor with my baby brother. She invited us for dinner the day a tree fell over in our backyard, taking our electrical wires down with it. She fed our cats when we were away. The day I turned 18, she registered me to vote.
This flood of memories was launched by a YouTube video my sister sent me. It shows Barack Obama campaigning in front of an Indianapolis polling station on the day of the Indiana primary. There right at the start, Obama is shaking hands with Mrs. Porter.
I've been lucky in my neighbors. Like my parents, I've found faithful friends and networks of support across the backyard fence. My sons became best friends with the boys down the street. Those boys' parents and I have shared babysitting, carpools, tools, impromptu dinners and some memorable camping trips. The retired couple across the street has been a reliable source of household advice and garden produce. The next door neighbors cheerfully endured balls, frisbees and boys unexpectedly flying into their yard. And I've always found someone to feed my cat.
Of course, with some neighbors I've never exchanged more than an occasional wave, and others have come and gone barely noticed. Some have had loud parties or noisy dogs. With work, kids, and dark, drizzly winters, it's easy to go months without talking to anyone else on my street. But over the years, when illness, death, criminal activity, earthquake or some other extraordinary event has interrupted the normal patterns of life, my neighbors have banded together and responded as a caring community.
As Americans, we take pride in our independence and our ability to achieve on our own. That streak of rugged individualism is balanced by an equally strong drive to build community that runs through American history and the American character. Pioneer settlers banded together to organize schools, churches and Granges. Neighbors have gathered for barn-raisings and sewing circles. Today still, Americans unite in PTAs, block watches, volunteer fire departments, Habitat for Humanity builds and multiple other ways.
That instinct for pitching in for the common good, side-by-side with people from different generations and different backgrounds, keeps our democracy strong.
Today the community-building side of our American character seems to be dwindling. Television, iPods, attached garages and cell phones keep us in little capsules, in touch with our inner circle, but oblivious to the world around us. Meanwhile driving alone and talk radio nurture an us-against-them attitude.
In the book "Bowling Alone," Robert Putnam documents the sharp decline in Americans meeting face-to-face. From bowling leagues, to civic clubs, to dinners with friends and family, Americans at the dawn of the 21st century get together less often than in decades past. The Internet may be creating new ways of linking up, but virtual connections really aren't the same.
We also move a lot. According to U.S. Census data, about 11 percent of Washington homeowners and 46 percent of renters moved in the previous 15 months. That's a little higher than the national average. Frequent moves not only make it harder for adults to establish community bonds, but also put children at particular risk by disrupting schooling, activities and relationships.
The season of long, light evenings and warmer weather is beginning, when we emerge from our houses and cars, into our yards and neighborhoods. Some summers past, I confess, I've avoided spending too much time chatting with my neighbors as I've rushed to my car or focused on completing outdoor chores. But seeing that YouTube clip of Mrs. Porter has gotten me to make a Memorial Day resolution. This summer I'm going to slow down and take the time to get to know some new neighbors.
Marilyn Watkins, policy director of the Economic Opportunity Instititue (www.eoionline.org), writes every other Wednesday. Her e-mail address is marilyn@eoionline.org.
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