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Herald staff

Spotlight misses the great state of Washington




Simply stated: When Hillary Clinton moved to skip the roll call and nominate Barack Obama by acclamation as the Democratic candidate, Washington and several other states were denied the traditional opportunity to boast.

Seizing the moment, The Buzz offers its own nominating speech extolling the virtues of the Evergreen State:

My fellow Americans, I'm proud of my state of Washington, proud that in this state you can order a cup of coffee made with an $11,000 espresso machine, then turn around and buy a 99-cent cheeseburger and call it lunch.

I'm proud to say that in Washington state you can strip to your skivvies, paint yourself orange and black and lock yourself in a cage (above), and most people will shrug their shoulders and figure you're mostly harmless.

I'm proud to say that in this state you can enter the Evergreen State Fair, go home with a ribbon for Special Achievement in Table Setting, then celebrate with corn on the cob drenched in butter that drips down your shirt.

And finally, let me say that were it not for the great state of Washington, Idaho would have more than 350 miles of coastline, which would just be a waste of good sand.

-- Jon Bauer, Herald staff

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