There's at least one safe place for your money

Down from that ledge. Sure, it's a nightmare on Wall Street, but look on the bright side. It's great for business at Judd & Black. Mattress sales should take off, since the only safe place for your money is underneath one.

Separated at birth: Tina Fey's spot-on performance as Sarah Palin on "Saturday Night Live" has fans eager for an encore. But Fey might be awfully busy. The uncanny resemblance has opened up several possibilities -- visiting Palin's Mom for her; going around Alaska and pretending to be governor; and being Palin's stunt double in the upcoming action movie "Drill, Baby, Drill!"

Hit it here: In the grand tradition of great ballpark names such as Pizza Hut Park and U.S. Cellular Field, the Minnesota Twins will soon play baseball at the new Target Field. True to the store's image, hot dog vendors will sell six-packs of tube socks for $1.99.

And get ready for Co-Ops Rock, a fundraiser sponsored by organic grocers. By "rock," presumably they mean folk bands covering Joni Mitchell songs. But don't be put off. It'll be just like any other concert, aside from the special parking for VW Buses and distinct odor of patchouli.