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Monday
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CONTACT THE HERALD
Melanie Munk, Features Editor
munk@heraldnet.com
 
Published: Monday, May 18, 2009

Got time? Lend a senior your ears

One of the greatest gifts we have to share with others is the quiet art of listening.

Listening to understand someone and caring about what another person has to say can make a real difference in two lives, yours and theirs.

Charla Hattendorf calls this "compassionate listening," and she's seeking volunteers who will do just that for older people who may be ill, frail, lonely or all of these and more.

Hattendorf is the volunteer coordinator for Partners in Palliative Care. It's a Providence program in partnership with The Everett Clinic.

This approach to health care is a team effort of nurses, physicians, social workers and volunteers who are committed to making the last years of an elder's life as comfortable as possible.

Barb Bennett of Lakewood has been such a volunteer since last fall. For years she was a familiar face in the Lakewood School District offices, where she was an administrative assistant. After retiring, she knew she wanted to find ways to "give back to the community."

She sees real value in the time she spends listening to folks for whom she is one link in a team of people who care.

Her calls are casual, the call of a friend. "I let them know I'm a volunteer, and I'm checking to see how they're doing today. I ask if they've had any changes, how they're doing and what makes them happy," Bennett said. That usually begins a conversation that may cover many subjects.

As Bennett listens, she may come to know problems or concerns the patient has not spoken of before. "We've learned to pay careful attention, and if things don't seem to be as they should be, we know what to do about getting that patient some help."

Hattendorf says there are currently about 800 patients involved in Partners for Palliative Care. Patients can call a nurse who is the lead person on their "care team" to get help at any time.

Her volunteers add further support with a phone call once or twice a month. Patients hear a friendly voice and know this person is willing to simply listen to what's going on in their life.

Hattendorf describes these volunteers as an extra set of ears for the medical team. Like Bennett, each has been through a training session that involves listening skills, confidentiality, the paperwork routine and ways to draw older people out in conversation.

Sometimes these calls may last 15 minutes, other times an hour. "It is important to listen to their stories because it validates their lives," she said.

Margaret McKay-Green was a volunteer at General Hospital for many years and active in the hospital's children's guild when she decided to become a telephone caller on Hattendorf's team. "The people I call are appreciative of the attention. It's very easy to talk with them and very rewarding. I think we provide a very good service for patients and their physicians," she said.

When the phone call ends, the volunteer fills out a report about concerns the conversation may have generated. For example, is the patient in pain and not talking about it to medical staff? Are there issues with medication, loneliness, depression?

That report is sent to Hattendorf, who forwards it immediately to the appropriate clinic staff.

When the situation is serious and needs immediate attention, volunteer Barb Bennett said she's called the patient's nurse directly.

Volunteers are usually assigned two to six patients to call once or twice a month.

I think of it as being the "pal" in palliative care.

Oops: I might be a nitwit, as one friendly caller suggested, but I'm hanging my defense on a "senior moment." I should never have given a guy named Dorsey credit for a Glenn Miller hit. So if you're "In the Mood," excuse my gaffe.

Linda Bryant Smith writes about growing older, surviving and finding a little gold in the golden years. You can reach her at ljbryantsmith@yahoo.com.

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