Rowing the Atlantic: Lessons Learned on the Open Ocean
A mother and daughter find a world of discussion around Roz Savage's adventure on the sea.
By Cheryl Murfin with Maddy Murfin-Bond
My daughter, Maddy, and I decided to read Roz Savage's Rowing the Atlantic together for very different reasons: mine a little lofty, hers practical.
I was hoping Savage's solo row across the sea would inspire my social butterfly of a teen to care less about what her friends think and to follow her own drum a bit more. Maddy was dying to know how anyone in her right mind would row 3,000 miles over 103 days in potentially shark-infested waters – no make-up, no friends, and, horror of all horrors, no texting.
I am happy to report that neither of us was disappointed by this mother-daughter literary sojourn.
Savage, who deserves the title “role model for woman power” for her courage, sense of adventure and environmental activism, did in fact inspire my 14-year-old. Not that she's picking up the oars, but between the book, Warren Etheredge's recent fascinating interview with Savage at “The Good Life: Books for Better Living” series in Seattle, and a subsequent conversation with the author, my daughter and I are both thinking quite a lot about the importance of setting your sights high, and the value of sticking to something you believe in – even when your friends want you go in other directions. And, even better, we are talking about these things. Besides being a good read, Rowing the Atlantic provided us a great launch for discussions on body image, courage, challenge and determination.
Maddy loved the fact that Savage's friends told her that she was crazy when she announced she would row coast to coast. They told her that she wasn't big enough, tall enough or strong enough. She proved them all wrong.
As for Maddy's incredulous query about the sanity of cutting oneself off from Facebook and MySpace, she learned that big adventures in nature can – and nowadays almost always do – include all her favorite social media. Savage, who did her Atlantic crossing in 2005 and has since rowed two-thirds of the way across the Pacific Ocean, video tapes, photographs, Twitters and blogs her rowing adventures thoroughly. She also spends ample time on her satellite phone chatting with her mom and friends as she skulls across the sea.
Still, despite the technology, sea rowing is isolating, sometimes arduous and often quite dull. And, that, Savage says, is when she learns the most – listening to books on tape, playing memory games and good old-fashioned thinking.
Following are Savage's answers to a few of our questions about what she took away from her first sea odyssey and what she wants young women to learn from her efforts and her book.
Murfin and Maddy: What does it take to live out a dream like you did? Savage: Everybody is different, but I think setting goals is important. I am quite a goal-driven person and I get a huge sense of achievement out of setting a goal and working toward it. Just having a dream and working toward it is immensely rewarding. And the power of not giving up when you run into the first hurdle is huge.
Murfin and Maddy: Looking back, did your own teen years prepare you for this challenge? What would you say to inspire your 14-year-old self? Savage: If I could look at the 14-year-old me, I would tell her not to worry so much about what other people think about her and to put herself first. I worried far too much about what other people thought of me back then. What I learned is that you can't control what other people think of you.
I didn't do any sport in high school and I did as little physical education in school as possible. I was very self-conscious. Now I realize that those are physically formative years. Being active young really does put you in good stead for a life of health and I wish more girls really understood that.
I was also very conscious about my weight and not in a very healthy way when I was a teen. I wish I [had] discovered sooner that it's a lot healthier to control weight through exercise rather than controlling food. I wish I knew then that exercise makes me feel good about myself, my skin looks better, I eat better and I am stronger.
It's hard when you are young not to compare yourself to other people and I find it difficult not to do even now. But now I know there is always going to be someone taller or thinner or who has nicer clothes, and one of the things that I am working on is not comparing myself, but loving what I have. Spending time with myself helped me with this.
Murfin and Maddy: Were you afraid to be alone? Savage: No, actually. It was the one thing I was fairly confident about – that I would be happy in my solitude out there. I really enjoyed the solitude. What I did was a bit extreme, but I think that everything gets hectic these days. We forget that historically most people would have had time to themselves in the fields, hunting and gathering, traveling. A lot of people, especially young people, fear being alone – but they really shouldn't.
In fact, I really think everyone, especially young women, should spend a couple of hours alone at least every week – perhaps just writing – not relying on anyone or anything else to entertain them but their own thoughts and ideas.
Maddy: Weren't you bored? I can't imagine being able to deal with being so bored. Savage: My dad used to say that only boring people get bored. But the truth is I did get bored. I had to find ways to entertain myself. I would send myself on a trajectory mentally, sometimes walking around all the houses I had lived in since childhood or trying to remember every minute detail of times with friends.
But I found that boredom helps you get through the clutter of the rest of your life. We are – and teens are especially – almost addicted to being busy and being around people. I think it is quite an educational exercise to allow yourself to get bored and then allow yourself to get below bored and to that place where you start to get to know yourself better.
Murfin: What are the critical lessons you learned in rowing the Atlantic? What are things you most want young people to get out of this book? Savage: The first is that what I do is more powerful than anything I say – I hope that just by my being out there and having a blast while I am out will inspire young people to follow their own dreams.
Second, I want to encourage young people to do what makes them feel most happy. Happiness is a very good indicator that you are doing the right thing. There is a lot of pressure to have you do things that don't make you feel happy at a gut level. It takes courage and strength to say, ‘Doing that doesn't make me feel good.' We all know in our heart of hearts what makes us happy, and we need to stick with that.
Another thing that I have learned is that one of the coolest things you can do is to see your passion come to fruition. When we are young, we all have these dreams and it's all too easy to feel like you've got to be more worldly-wise by 19 and give up childhood dreams. There's something about the dreams of your childhood that are very precious. I had to go through a process of reconnecting with those. It would be lovely if people could hold on to that.
When I was young I dreamed of writing a book. I didn't know it was going to be an adventure book. I was so excited the day it was published.
And the final thing that I want everyone to hear from my experience is that we all have to look after this earth if we want it to look out for us. We are a part of nature, not apart from it.
Cheryl Murfin and Maddy Murfin-Bond, 14, live in Seattle. Murfin is communications director for Fuse Washington and Maddy is a middle school student.
