Killer phones?

Don't talk and eat: A state lawmaker in Maine wants cell phones to carry warnings that they can cause brain cancer, although there's no consensus among scientists that they do.

If the brain cancer thing is true, the best we can hope for is that only people who talk on their phones in restaurants will be afflicted.

Have fun, sweetie: At the Maurices specialty clothing store in Oak Harbor, shoppers gather for after-hours retail “parties." It's a win-win: The store gains new business by word-of-mouth, and the partygoers get personal attention from store staff and discounts on their purchases.

Actually, it's the rare, much-sought-after “triple win”: the husbands get to stay home for an evening with Erin Andrews on ESPN.

Rock bottom: A day after Mike Holmgren spurned them, the Seahawks paid homage to the Tom Flores era Sunday with a 24-7 loss to lowly Tampa Bay.

In response to the humiliating defeat, Seattle city officials might ease restrictions on paper grocery bags in order to give Hawks fans adequate supplies of headgear for the final home game of the season on Jan. 3.