Published: Monday, February 20, 2012
In our view / The lighter side of the news
Jolly Presidents' Day to you
Perhaps Presidents' Day, a holiday on the un-fun side of the scale, could be perked up by requiring costumes. Then modern presidents could mingle with historical ones. "After you, President Polk." "No, no, after you, President Bush and President Bush." Let's veto some headlines:
•"FBI says social media monitoring won't infringe privacy rights": Oh, well, as long as they say so, it must be true.
Or, the FBI figures, if Facebook can get away with spying on people, it wants in on the action, too.
•"Swiss craft janitor satellites to grab space junk": Thank goodness at least one country is concerned with keeping space tidy, since everybody else is busy junking it up. Thank you, Switzerland. Maybe James Dyson, the patented-cyclone-technology vaccuum guy, could spend some time up there, too.
•"Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show cans TV sponsor Pedigree over 'depressing' dog shelter ads": Trade reports say Westminster fired its TV sponsor of the past 24 years, Pedigree, because Pedigree's ads encouraging adoption of shelter dogs were deemed too depressing for the Westminster TV audience, the New York Daily News reported.
So this year, in order not to depress anyone, Prozac replaced Pedigree as the main sponsor of the show. OK, not really. Perky Purina was the sponsor.
•"Tipsy fruit flies on a mission": They're just looking for a good time, nothing serious.
•"Mike Leach loses appeal in suit vs Texas Tech": Ah, Washington State University's new football coach is a fighter, a scrapper.
After the Texas Supreme Court rejected the former coach's appeal in his wrongful termination lawsuit against Texas Tech, Leach's attorney vowed to keep fighting. The court issued its decision without comment more than two years after he was fired by the university amid allegations that he mistreated a player with a concussion.
Leach's attorney claims Leach couldn't get a job for months because of the firing. Well, in the sense that he waited to decide which offer to take. ("A lot of schools wanted him. He wanted us," WSU Athletic Director Bill Moos said.)
At WSU, Leach will be paid a base annual salary of $2 million, with supplemental income of $250,000 a year, plus performance incentives. So he came out all right.
Leach is also suing ESPN Inc. and a PR firm, accusing them of libel and slander after he was fired. The lawsuit seeks undisclosed damages and retractions. Like his firing, it's a case he has no chance of winning.
Go, Cougs. Many happy returns. Hopefully the honeymoon period lasts through the first season.
"After you, President Ford." (He was a standout football player at the University of Michigan.)
•"FBI says social media monitoring won't infringe privacy rights": Oh, well, as long as they say so, it must be true.
Or, the FBI figures, if Facebook can get away with spying on people, it wants in on the action, too.
•"Swiss craft janitor satellites to grab space junk": Thank goodness at least one country is concerned with keeping space tidy, since everybody else is busy junking it up. Thank you, Switzerland. Maybe James Dyson, the patented-cyclone-technology vaccuum guy, could spend some time up there, too.
•"Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show cans TV sponsor Pedigree over 'depressing' dog shelter ads": Trade reports say Westminster fired its TV sponsor of the past 24 years, Pedigree, because Pedigree's ads encouraging adoption of shelter dogs were deemed too depressing for the Westminster TV audience, the New York Daily News reported.
So this year, in order not to depress anyone, Prozac replaced Pedigree as the main sponsor of the show. OK, not really. Perky Purina was the sponsor.
•"Tipsy fruit flies on a mission": They're just looking for a good time, nothing serious.
•"Mike Leach loses appeal in suit vs Texas Tech": Ah, Washington State University's new football coach is a fighter, a scrapper.
After the Texas Supreme Court rejected the former coach's appeal in his wrongful termination lawsuit against Texas Tech, Leach's attorney vowed to keep fighting. The court issued its decision without comment more than two years after he was fired by the university amid allegations that he mistreated a player with a concussion.
Leach's attorney claims Leach couldn't get a job for months because of the firing. Well, in the sense that he waited to decide which offer to take. ("A lot of schools wanted him. He wanted us," WSU Athletic Director Bill Moos said.)
At WSU, Leach will be paid a base annual salary of $2 million, with supplemental income of $250,000 a year, plus performance incentives. So he came out all right.
Leach is also suing ESPN Inc. and a PR firm, accusing them of libel and slander after he was fired. The lawsuit seeks undisclosed damages and retractions. Like his firing, it's a case he has no chance of winning.
Go, Cougs. Many happy returns. Hopefully the honeymoon period lasts through the first season.
"After you, President Ford." (He was a standout football player at the University of Michigan.)
Comments
(