Time Machine

Research in Motion, maker of the BlackBerry, is about to launch an updated version of its once-hot, now nearly forgotten smartphone.

But let’s face it, folks: the BlackBerry is just so hopelessly 2008. In fact, whenever you use one, four minutes get tacked back on to Sarah Palin’s 15 minutes of fame.

I’m a dinner jacket in space: Iran claimed Monday that it launched a monkey into space and returned it safely to Earth. The monkey rode in what looked like an infant’s car seat.

But if Iran’s space scientists want to achieve true glory, they’ll make the space capsule big enough to put Mahmoud Ahmadinejad into orbit.

Destined for the doghouse: Valentine’s Day craft projects scheduled at local Sno-Isle Library branches also include a couple of “anti” events, in which kids can blow off Cupid with suitably grumpy and unsentimental activities.

Those activities should include sleeping on the couch, because that’s what those kids will be doing from time to time when they get bigger.

— Mark Carlson, Herald staff

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More in Opinion

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Editorial cartoons for Thursday, March 28

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Initiative promoter Tim Eyman takes a selfie photo before the start of a session of Thurston County Superior Court, Wednesday, Feb. 10, 2021, in Olympia, Wash. Eyman, who ran initiative campaigns across Washington for decades, will no longer be allowed to have any financial control over political committees, under a ruling from Superior Court Judge James Dixon Wednesday that blasted Eyman for using donor's contributions to line his own pocket. Eyman was also told to pay more than $2.5 million in penalties. (AP Photo/Ted S. Warren)
Editorial: Initiative fee increase protects process, taxpayers

Bumped up to $156 from $5, the increase may discourage attempts to game the initiative process.

Protecting forests and prevent another landslide like Oso

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Boeing’s downfall started when engineers demoted

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Learn swimming safety to protect kids at beach, pool

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Comment: Why shootings have decreased but gun deaths haven’t

High-capacity magazines and ‘Glock switches’ that allow automatic fire have increased lethality.

Washington state senators and representatives along with Governor Inslee and FTA Administrator Nuria Fernandez break ground at the Swift Orange Line on Tuesday, April 19, 2022 in Lynnwood, Washington. (Olivia Vanni / The Herald)
Editorial: Community Transit making most of Link’s arrival

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Editorial cartoons for Wednesday, March 27

A sketchy look at the news of the day.… Continue reading

An image of Everett Mayor Cassie Franklin is reflected in a storefront window during the State of the City Address on Thursday, March 21, 2024, at thee Everett Mall in Everett, Washington. (Ryan Berry / The Herald)
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Mayor Franklin outlines challenges and responses as the city approaches significant decisions.

FILE - The massive mudslide that killed 43 people in the community of Oso, Wash., is viewed from the air on March 24, 2014. (AP Photo/Ted S. Warren, File)
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Burke: ‘Why not write about Biden, for once?’ Don’t mind if I do.

They asked; I’ll oblige. Let’s consider what the president has accomplished since the 2020 election.

Comment: Catherine missed chance to dispel shame of cancer

She wasn’t obligated to do so, but she might have used her diagnosis to educate a sympathetic public.

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