Cash for iClunkers

Push, pull or drag it in: Apple Inc. is launching an iPhone trade-in program that allows consumers to exchange older devices for credit on new smartphones.

As part of the used-car-dealership vibe, Apple Store employees will ditch the T-shirts and hoodies with the Apple logo in favor of plaid sportcoats with matching white belts and shoes.

O Canada: If you’re planning a trip to the Great White North, check out our guide to hassle-free border crossings. The nickel summary: Get your documents in order, and don’t be a jerk.

That means don’t make any wisecracks about the “51st state,” don’t sarcastically append “eh” to the ends of every sentence, and most of all, don’t loudly opine that Gretsky was “an OK player, I guess, but the dude was afraid to drop the gloves.”

Rodeo Drive REI: The new CEO of Recreational Equipment Inc., is a guy who formerly was an executive at luxury accessory maker Coach and ladies’ lingerie emporium Victoria’s Secret.

Perhaps this means we can expect designer handbags with water purification kits and see-though teddies with the optimal balance of weight and warmth for come-hither poses at high altitudes.

— Mark Carlson, Herald staff

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More in Opinion

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Editorial cartoons for Thursday, March 28

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Editorial cartoons for Wednesday, March 27

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Burke: ‘Why not write about Biden, for once?’ Don’t mind if I do.

They asked; I’ll oblige. Let’s consider what the president has accomplished since the 2020 election.

Comment: Catherine missed chance to dispel shame of cancer

She wasn’t obligated to do so, but she might have used her diagnosis to educate a sympathetic public.

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