Adapted from a recent online discussion.
Dear Carolyn:
My boss loves me and has really helped with my career. One little issue: She can’t say my name correctly. It’s a common name but she butchers it; think pronouncing Nina like Ny-nah instead of Nee-nah.
She has heard me and others pronounce my name Nee-nah hundreds of times, but she still says Ny-nah. Sometimes, she’ll get the link and say Nee-nah once but then goes back to Ny-nah.
I wouldn’t care except it is becoming embarrassing when she is in meetings talking about all the great things Ny-nah does and people look at me with a quizzical look. I feel like it looks bad on me that I haven’t corrected her. But, she clearly hears people say Nee-nah and still says Ny-nah. For the record, she also says Moto-sicle instead of Motorcycle even though every other person in the USA says Motorcycle. What do I do??
— Mispronounced
I think this reflects on her, not you, and therefore you can let it go.
As annoying as it is.
For what it’s worth, I think what it reflects on her is mild. Presumably we’ve all known people here and there, bright and competent ones, who struggle with pronunciations, or use malapropisms, or can’t spell to save their lives. This is personal for you so it seems unusual, but overall it’s just not that uncommon for people to have a kink in their verbal wiring. Even people without any noticeable language glitch can run across their white whale, the name they Just Can’t Get Right — often for a sympathetic reason, like a childhood bestie who spelled her name Nee-nah but pronounced it Ny-nah and wore a brain-to-tongue pathway that can’t be unworn.
Signed, the fourth of four sisters who in elementary school was often called every sister’s name but her own.
Re: Mispronounced:
A colleague of mine has a similar problem with names. We have a colleague whose name is missing the typical consonant, as in Ronal instead of Ronald. Another that is spelled with a consonant that is pronounced atypically — spelled with an “f,” but pronounced like a “v.” I’ve given up on correcting the pronunciation. It’s just a verbal tic and nothing to get worked up over.
— Given Up
Re: Mispronounced:
I have an unusual name that is frequently mistaken for a common one. In high school I had the same math teacher for 2½ years, including my senior year. He wrote me a glowing college recommendation, but referred to me throughout by the common name that wasn’t mine. It was the only time I’ve cared, because I thought the admissions folks might question how genuine his rec was.
Fortunately he showed it to me ahead of time (not standard practice) and we fixed it. He was glad I spoke up.
So, basically, if there is a real reason why your boss’s mispronunciation could harm you, have a gentle talk with her and make it about that reason. Otherwise, no reason to let it bother you.
— Unusual Name
Fair enough. Just don’t expect to stick what hasn’t ever stuck.
— Washington Post Writers Group
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