Cuba libre

You first, Brad: Making only his 12th major league start, Mariner pitcher Roenis Elias, earned a complete game shutout win Sunday against the Detroit Tigers. Elias, who defected from Cuba in 2010, then worked his way up the farm system, gave up only three hits in the 4-0 win.

So impressed with the toughness and unflappability of Elias, the Mariners have decided that when other players struggle, rather than being sent down to AAA Tacoma, players will be airdropped into Cuba and expected to work their way into the farm system from there.

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Skipper! High above Hawaii on Tuesday, NASA plans to test a new parachute system it hopes to use for missions to Mars. A test capsule will fall to earth, then deploy the chute and gently settle to earth.

We’ll have to check, but we’re pretty sure they already did this in an episode of “Gilligan’s Island.”

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Here’s the story of a lovely lady: Ann B. Davis, who played Alice the housekeeper on “The Brady Bunch” in the late ’60s and early ’70s, died Sunday at the age of 88.

To honor her memory as you pick up after your children today, smile, shake your head and quietly say to yourself, “Kids.”

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