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Look at this classroom, filled with humiliating punishments: A teacher who used a “Wheel of Misfortune” device to discipline her students will keep her job despite complaints from parents. Misbehaving students spun the wheel to determine their punishment.

The school district determined that the teacher didn’t really want to hurt or embarrass students. Besides, some kids were inspired to check out the real “Wheel of Fortune,” which led to priceless bonding time with their grandparents after supper.

Binders full of women: Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella has again apologized to employees for his gaffe about women seeking pay raises, and announced that all workers will receive training on inclusive workplaces.

In the company-wide memo, Nadella also said that anyone who knows hot chicks who want to work for Microsoft should send the candidates’ photos to him.

Don’t know much about history: On this day in 1867, the United States took possession of Alaska from Russia.

Russian president Vladimir Putin marked the anniversary by ordering his top scientists to invent a time machine so he can go back 147 years and prevent the deal.

— Mark Carlson and John McCartney, Herald staff

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More in Opinion

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Editorial cartoons for Thursday, March 28

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Initiative promoter Tim Eyman takes a selfie photo before the start of a session of Thurston County Superior Court, Wednesday, Feb. 10, 2021, in Olympia, Wash. Eyman, who ran initiative campaigns across Washington for decades, will no longer be allowed to have any financial control over political committees, under a ruling from Superior Court Judge James Dixon Wednesday that blasted Eyman for using donor's contributions to line his own pocket. Eyman was also told to pay more than $2.5 million in penalties. (AP Photo/Ted S. Warren)
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Washington state senators and representatives along with Governor Inslee and FTA Administrator Nuria Fernandez break ground at the Swift Orange Line on Tuesday, April 19, 2022 in Lynnwood, Washington. (Olivia Vanni / The Herald)
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FILE - The massive mudslide that killed 43 people in the community of Oso, Wash., is viewed from the air on March 24, 2014. (AP Photo/Ted S. Warren, File)
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Editorial cartoons for Wednesday, March 27

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Burke: ‘Why not write about Biden, for once?’ Don’t mind if I do.

They asked; I’ll oblige. Let’s consider what the president has accomplished since the 2020 election.

Comment: Catherine missed chance to dispel shame of cancer

She wasn’t obligated to do so, but she might have used her diagnosis to educate a sympathetic public.

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