Deflect and deflate: Famously a man of very few words, at least with the media, Seattle Seahawks running back Marshawn Lynch complied with an NFL order to participate in Tuesday’s Super Bowl Media Day. Lynch answered every reporter’s question with the same response: “I’m just here so I won’t get fined.”
The NFL ought to just take what it can get from Lynch. At least he didn’t take the opportunity to check that his balls were properly inflated.
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Not a square deal: As you may have noticed, the size of a “square” of toilet paper has shrunk by about a half-inch from the traditional 4.5 inches square.
In scientific circles it’s even got a name now: the Charmin Inverse Corollary, wherein the size of toilet paper sheets, airliner seats and your jeans are inversely related to the size of the American rear end.
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Don’t know much about history: On this day in 1547, King Henry VIII died and was succeeded by his nine-year-old son, Edward VI.
Edward’s first decree was to declare his royal advisers “doody-heads” because they wouldn’t buy him an Xbox.
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