Slide survivor Tim Ward reflects on a year accomplished

ARLINGTON — Tim Ward keeps thinking about the meaning of time.

He’s still working it out in his mind, what the hours, days and weeks are supposed to measure.

Today, a year has passed since he survived the mudslide that took his bride, Brandy, and their life together on Steelhead Drive. The year since March 22, 2014, didn’t determine where he’ll go. It didn’t define what he’ll do. Maybe a year isn’t the best yardstick.

Tim turned 59 last month. He could have many more years, and that time has meaning, too. He thinks about it, whenever his phone rings, and as he gets into bed for another sleep-troubled night.

His life keeps ticking past, day after day, with Blue, his German shorthaired pointer, at his side.

He finds comfort in Brandy’s pictures on the wall of his rental house in Arlington.

Their marriage of nearly 38 years wasn’t perfect, but the commitment mattered. Arguments ended in a hug and a kiss.

At night in bed, they would talk about the ups and downs of the day. It’s Blue now on the pillow on Brandy’s side of the mattress, the dog who lost a hind leg after being pinned by a cedar in the mud. Every night without fail, three-legged Blue creeps and kicks his way onto Tim’s side of the bed.

Tim’s faith tells him that Brandy is beyond time. One day she’ll turn around in Heaven and he’ll be there.

He’s grown closer to his daughters, Tiffany and Brittany. The girls are tighter, too. It feels selfish to want Brandy back, he said, when because of her, “we respect life so much more.”

Tim and Blue go out to the slide sometimes, to the turnout where their driveway used to be, where neighbor Seth Jefferds always planted daffodils under the mailboxes. It feels right to be there. It smells like home and Blue loves to run.

Gone, too, are neighbors Kris and John Regelbrugge, who had loved to share their front porch and backyard.

Once, Brandy got caught in a log jam while inner tubing the North Fork Stillaguamish River. It was John, the Navy commander, who barked out orders and organized her rescue.

These days, the Regelbrugge family is having a single headstone made with the names of both parents. Kris was found four months after the slide, and after her husband’s memorial. She and John are being reunited in a cemetery in California.

In a year, Tim hasn’t settled on a new home. His old property is tied up in legal wrangling and negotiation. This winter, he went to look at acreage near Oso’s Rhodes River Ranch. It was a beautiful piece of land, but as he walked, he kept peering over his shoulder. He was looking for Brandy, to see what she thought and where she might want to put the chicken house. He realized he was trying to replace something that’s been lost, forever.

For months after that, he stayed away from Oso.

People have given so much to the survivors, and Tim is grateful for the generosity. Often, the simplest way to help someone is with something material, he said. He finds solace in the gifts: a tablet to watch Netflix, a shelf ready for books and dishes in the china cabinet.

Even decisions about the contents of his rental house can be complicated. One day, he made up his mind to buy kerosene lamps from the Arlington Co-Op Supply.

The blue-glass lamps decorate his living room. They’d be perfect for a power outage in a winter storm.

Are there such storms in Arlington? Was he wrong to buy the lamps?

The pieces of his life have jagged edges now. They don’t fit together like they once did.

So he and Blue take walks. They go to Tim’s physical therapy and Blue’s service dog training. Tim helps organize weekly support groups for slide survivors. He represents families in the talks about building a memorial.

Survivors don’t have to say anything when they get together. Some didn’t talk much before. Some don’t know where to start, how to put words to darkness that doesn’t easily come to the surface.

“Everybody’s trying their best to help each other get through this,” he said.

New stories emerge and people’s experiences overlap and contrast. Sometimes supporting each other means just sitting there, spending time. Sometimes it’s sharing a cherry crumb cake, with Blue inhaling his piece from a plate on the floor.

Tim’s making new memories, finding moments of joy amid months of grief. He knows he can’t push down the hurt, or it would fester.

He lost Brandy, not the memories of the lifetime they spent together.

He needs time. Time means finding a way for the past and future to fit together in one life. And in his future, despite its unknowns, are the friendships that survived the mud and the friendships that grew from its depths.

Tim’s pelvis and right hip were crushed. He moves better than he did six months ago, using a cane instead of a walker. He jokes that he’s held together by bolts. His feet are different sizes and his toes often feel like they’re on fire.

Tim moved into the Arlington rental in October. He had reservations about leaving his daughter’s house near Warm Beach, but he knew he had to try, to keep pushing himself. He hears every noise in the house, every truck that passes on Highway 9. The grumble of compression brakes stops him. He hears echoes of the roar the earth made as it swallowed his house.

Survivors understand. They no longer ask each other, “How’s it going?”

That doesn’t work anymore. What should they say? Would others really want the truth?

They greet each other differently. They say, “It’s good to see you,” and it is. It is good.

Reporter Eric Stevick contributed to this story.

Rikki King: 425-339-3449; rking@heraldnet.com.

Sunday schedule

Highway 530 will be closed between Oso and Darrington from 9 a.m. to noon Sunday for the one-year remembrance event in the slide zone. The event is not open to the general public. The detour route is Highway 20 through Skagit County.

A community potluck is planned for 1 p.m. at the Darrington Community Center, 570 Sauk Ave. Food needs to arrive by noon.

The Oso Fire Department plans an open house from 1 to 4 p.m. at its fire hall, 21824 Highway 530. The start time is tentative as the Oso firefighters will be coming back from the remembrance event.

The Darrington Fire Department plans an open house from 1 to 3 p.m. at its fire hall, 1115 Seeman St.

About relief

Most relief efforts directly benefiting survivors have wrapped up. The Cascade Valley Hospital Foundation plans to accept donations for Oso mudslide relief at least until the end of June. Donations specifically for mudslide relief no longer can be made online. Instead, people can call Heather Logan at 360-618-7805 or email foundation@cascadevalley.org.

Talk to us

> Give us your news tips.

> Send us a letter to the editor.

> More Herald contact information.

More in Local News

A firefighter stands in silence before a panel bearing the names of L. John Regelbrugge and Kris Regelbrugge during the ten-year remembrance of the Oso landslide on Friday, March 22, 2024, at the Oso Landslide Memorial in Oso, Washington. (Ryan Berry / The Herald)
‘Flood of emotions’ as Oso Landslide Memorial opens on 10th anniversary

Friends, family and first responders held a moment of silence at 10:37 a.m. at the new 2-acre memorial off Highway 530.

Julie Petersen poses for a photo with images of her sister Christina Jefferds and Jefferds’ grand daughter Sanoah Violet Huestis next to a memorial for Sanoah at her home on March 20, 2024 in Arlington, Washington. Peterson wears her sister’s favorite color and one of her bangles. (Annie Barker / The Herald)
‘It just all came down’: An oral history of the Oso mudslide

Ten years later, The Daily Herald spoke with dozens of people — first responders, family, survivors — touched by the deadliest slide in U.S. history.

Victims of the Oso mudslide on March 22, 2014. (Courtesy photos)
Remembering the 43 lives lost in the Oso mudslide

The slide wiped out a neighborhood along Highway 530 in 2014. “Even though you feel like you’re alone in your grief, you’re really not.”

Director Lucia Schmit, right, and Deputy Director Dara Salmon inside the Snohomish County Department of Emergency Management on Friday, March 8, 2024, in Everett, Washington. (Ryan Berry / The Herald)
How Oso slide changed local emergency response ‘on virtually every level’

“In a decade, we have just really, really advanced,” through hard-earned lessons applied to the pandemic, floods and opioids.

Ron and Gail Thompson at their home on Monday, March 4, 2024 in Oso, Washington. (Olivia Vanni / The Herald)
In shadow of scarred Oso hillside, mudslide’s wounds still feel fresh

Locals reflected on living with grief and finding meaning in the wake of a catastrophe “nothing like you can ever imagine” in 2014.

Alan Dean, who is accused of the 1993 strangulation murder of 15-year-old Bothell girl Melissa Lee, appears in court during opening statements of his trial on Monday, March 18, 2024, at Snohomish County Superior Court in Everett, Washington. (Ryan Berry / The Herald)
Guilty: Jury convicts Bothell man in long-unsolved 1993 killing

Even after police arrested Alan Dean in 2020, it was unclear if he would stand trial. He was convicted Thursday in the murder of Melissa Lee, 15.

Ariel Garcia, 4, was last seen Wednesday morning in an apartment in the 4800 block of Vesper Dr. (Photo provided by Everett Police)
Everett police searching for missing child, 4

Ariel Garcia was last seen Wednesday at an apartment in the 4800 block of Vesper Drive. The child was missing under “suspicious circumstances.”

The rezoned property, seen here from the Hillside Vista luxury development, is surrounded on two sides by modern neighborhoods Monday, March 25, 2024, in Lake Stevens, Washington. (Ryan Berry / The Herald)
Despite petition, Lake Stevens OKs rezone for new 96-home development

The change faced resistance from some residents, who worried about the effects of more density in the neighborhood.

Rep. Suzan DelBene, left, introduces Xichitl Torres Small, center, Undersecretary for Rural Development with the U.S. Department of Agriculture during a talk at Thomas Family Farms on Monday, April 3, 2023, in Snohomish, Washington. (Olivia Vanni / The Herald)
Under new federal program, Washingtonians can file taxes for free

At a press conference Wednesday, U.S. Rep. Suzan DelBene called the Direct File program safe, easy and secure.

Former Snohomish County sheriff’s deputy Jeremie Zeller appears in court for sentencing on multiple counts of misdemeanor theft Wednesday, March 27, 2024, at Snohomish County Superior Court in Everett, Washington. (Ryan Berry / The Herald)
Ex-sheriff’s deputy sentenced to 1 week of jail time for hardware theft

Jeremie Zeller, 47, stole merchandise from Home Depot in south Everett, where he worked overtime as a security guard.

Everett
11 months later, Lake Stevens man charged in fatal Casino Road shooting

Malik Fulson is accused of shooting Joseph Haderlie to death in the parking lot at the Crystal Springs Apartments last April.

T.J. Peters testifies during the murder trial of Alan Dean at the Snohomish County Courthouse on Tuesday, March 26, 2024 in Everett, Washington. (Olivia Vanni / The Herald)
Bothell cold case trial now in jury’s hands

In court this week, the ex-boyfriend of Melissa Lee denied any role in her death. The defendant, Alan Dean, didn’t testify.

Support local journalism

If you value local news, make a gift now to support the trusted journalism you get in The Daily Herald. Donations processed in this system are not tax deductible.