Cheap ‘Norm’ is bear-ly bear-able

  • By Robert Horton Herald Movie Critic
  • Wednesday, January 13, 2016 4:55pm
  • LifeGo-See-Do

Let’s not go for the “Revenant” jokes — yes, there is a bear in “Norm of the North,” and no, he does not attack Leonardo DiCaprio in any way.

This is a family film, after all, although what kind of family will enjoy this cheapo animated feature is hard to guess. The fact that “Norm” carries an environmental message doesn’t cut it any slack, either.

Norm (voiced by Rob Schneider) is a polar bear, born with a rare genetic anomaly that allows him to speak English. He prefers singing and dancing to hunting seals, a tendency that is welcomed by seals and visiting tourists alike.

But when Norm gets a chance to visit New York City, he forgets about playing Broadway. Instead, he delivers a message on the over-development of the Arctic, in hopes of staving off a greedy real-estate mogul (Ken Jeong from the “Hangover” movies, completely manic here).

Not a real fun story line. So Norm is given some lemmings as sidekicks, who do not at all resemble the penguins from the “Madagascar” movies or the minions from the “Despicable Me” franchise.

The movie tries to deflect the obvious tie-in when a real estate agent (Heather Graham) spots the lemmings and notes how “marketable” they are. That’s for sure.

The lemmings don’t speak English — I mean they’re lemmings, not polar bears, duh — but they do a lot of tumbling and chirping. They also let loose plenty of flatulence gags, which are always good for a laugh, as Shakespeare noted.

Well, maybe not always. Not the 10th time, anyway.

“Norm” is drawn up like a mathematical formula: There’s Norm’s crusty grandfather (Colm Meaney), and a wise seabird (Bill Nighy) with an English accent. There’s quite a bit of “Happy Feet,” and a touch of “How to Train Your Dragon,” too.

The film’s visual style is extremely basic, and the lame jokes and scattered storytelling make you appreciate how focused the best animated films are. Cartoons have to be trimmed down — stray plot lines and overwritten dialogue is too expensive to animate, so scripts tend to be much tighter than live-action films. Compared to the best animated movies, “Norm” has a lot of blubber.

“Norm of the North” (1 star)

A cheapo animated film about a polar bear (Rob Schneider) who can speak English. He goes to New York City to deliver an environmental message, taking his oh-so-marketable lemmings in tow. A flabby movie.

Rating: PG, for subject matter

Showing: Alderwood Mall, Everett Stadium, Marysville, Meridian, Woodinville, Cascade Mall

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