A dog’s life

Fido, go to your room: Luxury home builders in California and Florida now offer pet suites as large as 170 square feet, about the size of a large bedroom. They’re equipped with walk-in bathing tubs, dog hair dryers, automated feeding stations and much more.

Even so, the truly pampered pooch won’t be happy until his masters spring for the optional fire hydrant comfort station, chewable $200 Italian leather loafers, and jumbo-size hole in the fence between him and the French poodle next door

Happiness is a hot Fryolator: Burger King is getting rid of “Satisfries,” a lower-calorie take on french fries that some mocked as “Saddest Fries”.

Whoever called them that must have never eaten lunch in a school cafeteria.

What is this, a sidewalk in Paris? A golf course in a Portland, Oregon, suburb hired a pack of border collies to drive off thousands of Canada geese that were fouling the links with their prolific pooping.

When they’re done chasing the geese, maybe the pooches can nip at the heels of Everett dog owners who don’t pick up after their pets in Grand Avenue Park.

— Mark Carlson, Herald staff