Ah’m Bahtmahn, and Ah’m wicked pissah

Pahk da Bahtmahbile, Rahbin: The reaction from fanboys and others on the Internet has been as swift as it’s been negative: Few are interested in seeing Boston native Ben Affleck play the Dahk Knight (sorry), Batman, when he and Superman team up in a 2015 movie for Warner Bros.

Boy, they’re really going to be upset when they learn Wonder Woman is going to be played by Roseanne Barr.

It looks like you’re trying to replace your CEO. Can I help you with that? With Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer set to retire in a year, the question already is being asked who might replace him as the software giant continues a reorganization announced a month ago.

What Microsoft needs is someone who knows the company’s history, is personable, efficient and full of helpful ideas. We nominate Clippy, the Microsoft Office paperclip personal assistant.

Even cheaper than buying blanks: A small town in Georgia is backing away from an ordinance that mandates gun ownership for every head of household. In a settlement with a gun-control group, the town agreed to add a provision saying the ordinance was not enforceable and would never be enforced.

“Eureka!” cried every member of Congress. “Now we can pass laws, add a clause that says they won’t be enforced, and look like we’re actually getting something done.”

More in Opinion

Editorial cartoons for Friday, Nov. 24

A sketchy look at the day in politics.… Continue reading

Keillor: Don’t count calories today; count your blessings

Load up your plate with gratitude for the gifts of Providence, from profiteroles to procrastination.

Commentary: Test your knowledge of Thanksgiving

Don’t try talking turkey until your know the facts.

Dionne: Warts and all, reason to be thankful for journalism

How one editor, a World War II vet, encouraged what reporters still strive for in each day’s work.

Milbank: Since you asked, Sarah, this is what I’m thankful for

For starters: I’m thankful for the Founders’ checks and balances that stand between us and despotism.

Having gratitude for others enhances our lives

I am thankful for gratitude because it makes me focus on the… Continue reading

Thankful for care provided by Providence Breast Center

It is always important to take time to count one’s blessings. I… Continue reading

Providence guild’s volunteers make a difference

As we celebrate Thanksgiving and enter this joyful holiday season, I appreciate… Continue reading

Most Read