Burger democracy

Would you like a 401(k) with that? The Dick’s Drive-In chain, which is set to open a restaurant in Edmonds in November, attributes much of its success to how it treats its employees. Employees earn more than minimum wage and are eligible for health care and 401(k) plans as well as scholarships for students.

We’re often told that government should be run like a business. We’ll go further, and suggest Congress be replaced with a Dick’s.

Oh, the humanity: A 94-year-old Ohio woman woke Sunday to find a 128-foot-long deflated blimp in her back yard that had broke free of its moorings at a nearby airport and landed there.

The blimp’s owners, who were using the airship to advertise vodka, were fortunate that it didn’t land next door in the yard of Old Man Patterson, who has a collection of footballs, Frisbees and kites that neighborhood kids have lost over his fence.

A new wrinkle in hygiene: The FDA has approved the use of Botox, traditionally used to reduce facial wrinkles, as a treatment for hyperhidrosis, or excessive underarm sweating. The Botox injections temporarily block the nerve signals that stimulate sweat glands.

The only reported drawback is that patients report that their underarms look 20 years younger than the rest of their bodies.

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