Eat more caviar

One potato, no potato: Retaliating for U.S. and Western European sanctions related to the Ukraine crisis, Russian President Vladimir Putin announced an import ban on all U.S. agricultural products. Russia relies heavily on Western food imports, particularly in Moscow.

Following the announcement, customers quickly cleared supermarket shelves of Borscht Helper, and the Moscow McDonald’s added the McPirogi to its Ruble Value Menu.

Danger, Will Robinson! Some technology experts are reconsidering whether robots will fully replace humans in the work place. “We consistently underestimate the intelligence and complexity of human beings,” said a Microsoft researcher.

Like the human intelligence and complexity that invented the Microsoft Zune.

Don’t know much about history: On this day in 1882, the feud between the Hatfields and McCoys erupted into violence.

Sadly, reality television wasn’t around to turn the bloody long-running battle into a series on Bravo as a lead-in to “The Real Housewives of Orange County.”

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