If you can’t walk on water, skinny dip in it

Jon Bauer, Herald staff

Skinny dip

Oh, ye of little thought: Kansas Congressman Kevin Yoder, R-In The Altogether, has apologized for swimming naked in the Sea of Galilee, considered a holy site by Christians because they believe Jesus walked on its waters. Yoder was in Israel with other lawmakers on a fact-finding mission.

The fact Yoder found: There is shrinkage when swimming in the Galilee, but it only increases one’s embarrassment.

Check Craigslist: The National Insurance Crime Bureau reports that for the fourth straight year, the 1994 Honda Accord was the most frequently stolen vehicle model in the U.S. Last year 7,596 ‘94 Honda Accords were reported stolen.

There can’t possibly be 7,596 ‘94 Honda Accords still on the road, so car thieves apparently are stealing the same light blue hatchback with primer patches.

Don’t know much about history: On this day in 1609, Galileo Galilei demonstrated his new telescope to a group of officials atop the Campanile bell tower in Venice.

Galileo tried to keep the officials’ attention focused on the stars and planets, but the group repeatedly pointed the telescope toward a group of skinny-dipping lawmakers down in the canals.