Island getaway

In case you’re planning a fantasy vacation: The governor of Hawaii announced that his office has been informed of the imminent sale of the island of Lanai, home to about 3,200 people. The island had an asking price of $500 million to $600 million.

The governor said he was sworn to secrecy about the buyer’s identity, but sources said they saw a well-dressed man in a white three-piece suit who spoke with a Spanish accent and who was accompanied by a much smaller man in the same white suit, urging him to hurry or they’d miss, “De plane! De plane!”

Pineapple with your oatmeal? Workers at a Quaker Oats plant in Des Moines, Iowa, claimed their $160.3 million lump-sum prize in the Powerball lottery, splitting the winnings among 20 employees.

Yeah, that’s still about $340 million short, but $160 million would buy a nice stretch of beach.

Future’s so bright I gotta wear shades: Boeing 787 customer All Nippon Airways has notified the jetmaker that the windows on its 787s — with special glass that can be dimmed — don’t stay dark enough on long flights.

Coincidently, Boeing announced that it was offering a range of stylish curtains as an option for new Dreamliners.

Fore! A woman in Uxbridge, Mass., told police that her GPS was responsible for directing her to drive her car into a sand trap at a golf course.

Police, noting the woman was intoxicated, doubted her story until the GPS spoke up and recommended a bunker shot with a sand wedge.

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