Science just a technicality

Well, at least it’s a warm mist. Let’s thunder at the headlines.

•”No new name for high-fructose corn syrup”: The Corn Refiners Association lost its public-relations bid to change the name to “corn sugar.”

The Center for Food Safety and Applied Nutrition at the FDA denied the petition, saying the term “sugar” is used only for food “that is solid, dried and crystallized.” Syrup happens to have none of those properties. The Corn Refiners responded by saying the FDA officials had rejected the petition on “narrow, technical grounds.”

Yes, when it comes to science, why quibble about “narrow, technical grounds”?

•”Concern over drive-up alcohol sales spurs efforts at ban”: Seems 23 states allow some kind of drive-up or drive-through liquor sales. In Louisiana, in addition to packaged liquor, drivers can buy ready-to-drink frozen alcoholic drinks — made with rum, vodka, tequila or other alcohol with concentrations as high as 190-proof — from their cars without breaking the state’s open container law.

That sounds insane, on general, non-technical grounds. And we were worried about some bikini baristas.

•”Apple will start selling iPad in China July 20”: They will try to match sales from all fake Apple stores in China that have been selling the “iPad” since its inception.

Lawmakers furious over China-made U.S. Olympic uniform”: So very furious. Telling the U.S. Olympic Committee they should be ashamed that the uniforms, designed by Ralph Lauren, were made in China. Sen. Harry Reid, D-Nevada, said they should burn them. “You’d think they’d know better,” said House Speaker John Boehner.

They can be self-righteous and outraged and rend their garments because Congress is known for doing so much to keep manufacturing jobs from moving overseas, particularly China. Oh, wait. Congress is not known for that. As the lawmakers did their denouncing, did anyone check the origin of the suits (or casual summerwear) they were sporting?

If the Olympic uniforms had been made in America, it might have made Congress feel warm and fuzzy, like we have a thriving clothes manufacturing industry, but once again the emperors have no clothes.

•”Alaska town elects a cat for mayor”: Stubbs ran successfully on the popular platform, “A tuna fish in every bowl and a mouse in every garage.”

NCAA president Mark Emmert paid at nearly $1.6M per year”: The former University of Washington president (where he earned $870,000 a year) was paid nearly $400,000 in compensation for his first three months in the position, which works out to the annual $1.6 million, nearly 40 percent more than his predecessor.

But hey, college football fans finally have their coveted playoff system in the works. So money well spent, the NCAA wagers.