Sketchy claims

Walk a mile in these shoes: Skechers, in an agreement with the Federal Trade Commission, has agreed to pay $40 million to settle charges that it made unfounded claims in advertising that the rounded soles of its Shape-ups shoes promoted weight loss and muscle toning.

As if we needed another reminder that the rounded bottom of our shoes won’t help us lose weight; however, getting off our own rounded bottom will.

Ohio player: After earlier considering a run for Congress in Washington state because his own seat vanished following redistricting, Ohio Rep. Dennis Kucinich, D-On Second Thought, says he will not come west because, “I can best serve from outside the Congress.”

We can think of 534 other loyal Americans who also could best serve from outside the Congress.

Hello, Joe: A new study of 400,000 people says that coffee drinkers are a more likely to live longer than those who don’t drink coffee and were less likely to die from heart or respiratory disease, stroke, diabetes, injuries, accidents or infections.

However, coffee drinkers now are more likely to die while standing in line at a Starbucks while the person in front of them orders a grande half-skinny, half 1 percent, extra hot, split-quad shot latte with four shots of white mocha and two shots of vanilla. With whip.

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