Take a hike

Don’t cry for me: South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford, R-Evita, revealed Wednesday that during his recent absence he wasn’t hiking as he initially explained but actually has been having an affair and had been “crying in Argentina” with the other woman.

The Buzz would like to thank the governor for providing us with yet another euphemism for sexual infidelity: hiking the Appalachian Trail.

Worst. Boss. Ever: Nevada Sen. John Ensign, R-Appalachian Trail, may have violated Senate ethics rules by firing the campaign aide he had an affair with as well as her husband, who was Ensign’s administrative assistant.

The U.S. Senate’s ethics rules are clear: Staffers who have had affairs with senators should be asked to resign quietly after being offered a generous “severance package.”

Thick as a brick: Archaeologists in Germany have unearthed a flute carved from a vulture bone that they believe is 35,000 years old. They say it may be the oldest handcrafted musical instrument ever discovered.

Rock flautist Ian Anderson of Jethro Tull said he dropped the flute during a pagan festival and wants it back.

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