The food’s lousy and portions are small

Oh, garcon: Yelp, the online review service that invites anyone to become a restaurant critic or hotel reviewer, has added to its helpful advice with reviews of jails and prisons, written by inmates and attorneys. An Orange County, Calif., jail, for example, is lauded on Yelp for its cleanliness, urban setting and “very nice” deputies.

The Buzz puts a lot of emphasis on atmosphere at the places we patronize. So the next time we’re hauled off to the hoosegow, our Yelp review will note the artistry of the jail tattoo staff, the depth of the prison wine list and whether the tin cups make a satisfying rattle against the cell bars.

Frontier justice: For the second time in less than a week, the Federal Deposit Insurance Corp. is going after former officials of a failed county-based bank. The FDIC is seeking $46 million from former Frontier Bank officials.

Sadly, as this is a civil and not a criminal case, we likely won’t get the benefit of the failed bankers’ reviews of the county jail.

Don’t know much about history: On this day in 1913, Gideon Sundback of Hoboken, N.J., received his patent for the “separable fastener,” later known as the zipper.

Prior to the zipper’s invention, whispered advice to “XYB” just confused the person with the open fly.

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