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Web Monkey
August 28  |  By Doug Parry
Pushing workers is Amazon's prime directive Did you know that Amazon workers are routinely driven to tears? That they’re scolded for not answering email after midnight? That drones monitor their movements off the clock? That even their bathroom breaks are timed to ensure productivity?

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August 21  |  By Doug Parry
During my formative years at Mountlake Terrace High School, I treated homework as one giant Houdini act.

I never did anything until the last minute. Given weeks to write a paper, there was a zero percent chance I would start it before midnight the day it was due. Procrastination wasn’t a personality flaw; it was an art form.

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August 14  |  By Doug Parry
You know a Tim Eyman initiative when you see one A "Tim Eyman Initiative" is like the "Fernando Rodney Experience." It’s a brand. If his name is attached, you know exactly what you’re going to get.

The Fernando Rodney Experience makes the end of a Mariners game an adventure, since even with a sizable lead there’s a chance he’ll snatch defeat from the jaws of victory.

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August 7  |  By Doug Parry
We're not shaken by earthquake predictions In case you missed the recent New Yorker article "The Really Big One," about the potential for a catastrophic earthquake in the Pacific Northwest, allow me to sum it up for you:


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July 31  |  By Doug Parry
Several options at ice caves, none of them good How do we prevent tragedies at the Big Four Ice Caves?

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July 24  |  By Doug Parry
In battle of wills, Seahawks can't beat Russell Wilson The Seattle Seahawks head into training camp next week with the best roster in football and a dark cloud hanging over the team and its fans.

Not the fateful goal-line pass in Super Bowl XLIX-NOOOO. We’re totally, completely, 100 percent over that. We barely even think about it when we lie awake at night.

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July 17  |  By Doug Parry
Bring back the grizzly bear if you dare You may have seen the recent documentary "Jurassic World," in which we learn of the horrible things that happen when people reintroduce animals that had vanished, especially when they do so at theme parks that have terrible security.

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July 10  |  By Doug Parry
Tap water is better if you don't think before you drink Those with discerning palates may have recently noticed a metallic taste – an eau de aluminum, if you will – in the local water supply.

No reason to be alarmed, Everett's Public Works department assures us. It's just a result of the treatment process. If you drink city water in moderation, there is almost zero chance your...

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July 3  |  By Doug Parry
Greetings from beautiful unincorporated Snohomish County, where fireworks are legal and freedom burns brightly every Fourth of July.

Through sheer luck, I live in an area that hasn't been annexed, so no fussbudget city council has taken away our right to celebrate Independence Day with a bang. On my street, trees are as dry as tinderboxes and kids are armed with incendiary devices, just like our founding fathers intended.

Oh, sure, some of you want to take our...

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June 26  |  By Doug Parry
Trivia time! Can you name the last Republican presidential candidate to carry Snohomish County?

Mitt Romney? No… John McCain? No… George W. Bush? Hahahaha. A thousand times, no. Actually just no two times, once for 2000 and once for 2004.

In fact, the last Republican to capture the county was George H.W. Bush in 1988.

You thought I was going to say Theodore...

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June 19  |  By Neal Pattison
Four more years! Four more years!

That's a popular sentiment among those supporting a political incumbent. But few of you were inclined to chant that advice to high school seniors who marched through graduation ceremonies this month.

Our latest survey at asked whether you thought a high school diploma is enough to guarantee success in...

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June 12  |  By Doug Parry
One doughnut shop devours the competition You have a passion for doughnuts.

We got a big response to our latest poll, which asked who makes Snohomish County's best doughnuts. Karl's, Frost, Oosterwyk's and Tyler's all had their share of supporters. In the end, though, it wasn't close. With 48 percent of the vote, Henry's ran away from the field like

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June 5  |  By Doug Parry
Decades later, we're still waiting for the next Interurban My grandmother tells this fantastical tale that's almost tempting to believe. The story goes that, as a girl, she could hop on a trolley in Seattle and ride around the Puget Sound region on an efficient commuter rail system.

Legend has it that the so-called Interurban was up and running a year after work began and was built out to Lynnwood and Everett within a decade.

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May 29  |  By Doug Parry
Apple can keep its Watches off our bodies Do you have your Apple Watch yet? Just 2 percent said they do in our latest poll at, with 4 percent more saying they can't wait to get one. That leaves 94 percent scratching our heads and wondering what the rest of...

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May 22  |  By Doug Parry
When you play politics, someone else might get hurt Is nothing sacred?

We tried to have a nice, innocent Internet poll, and politics just had to go and ruin it.

Our latest survey at asked who would get your vote for county executive if the election were held today — John Lovick, Dave Somers or someone else.

We figured "Someone Else" would win.

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May 15  |  By Doug Parry
With politics on the menu, do you eat at Chick-fil-A? They say the "third rail" of American politics is Social Security, but I think it might actually be chicken.

In our latest poll at, we asked if you would ever eat at Chick-fil-A, the

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May 11  |  By Doug Parry
Everett is making a big-screen cameo in the new movie "7 Minutes," and Hollywood Reporter says the film turned out well. But one passage from its review caught our eye:

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May 8  |  By Doug Parry
At the movies, you're holding out for a hero this summer In our latest poll, we had you choose from among the six most blockbustery looking summer movies to tell us which you're most excited about. Here's how the vote broke down, along with a brief synopsis* of each film:

*Note: All plot synopses are approximate.

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May 4  |  By Doug Parry
If you tried to visit HeraldNet today between, oh about 9 a.m. and 1 p.m., you might have noticed that we had some technical difficulties. If you're reading this now, we must have a working website again.

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May 1  |  By Doug Parry
A recent Herald editorial said we should put a state income tax on the table. Your response? Take that right back off the table. Then chop the table into small pieces and burn the house down, just to be sure.

State Treasurer James McIntire's proposal is pretty moderate. It would be a flat 5 percent tax on income above $50,000, along with a reduction in the state...

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April 24  |  By Doug Parry
Most of us like music we can spin In our latest poll at, we asked for your all-time favorite music format. Let's break it down, MC Hammer-style:

CDs (35 percent of the vote): They have high-quality sound and cool liner notes, can be 70 minutes long and are fairly indestructible. What's not to...

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April 17  |  By Doug Parry
It starts out clumsy and messy but exhilarating. And then, nine months later, you're sorting out how your life has changed.

We're talking, of course, about Washington's bouncing baby marijuana business. Stores have been open for nine months, and the state is still a little clueless.

One thing has been plain from the start. The taxing and regulation of marijuana is such a convoluted mess, you'd think everyone was smoking something. Depending on whether you're a...

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April 14  |  By Doug Parry
Procrastinators, we are here for you.

The Everett Post Office isn't, though. It no longer stays open until midnight on April 15 for late tax filers. If your tradition is to drop your taxes in the mail at closing time, you'll need to arrive before 5:30 p.m. Wednesday.

If you truly want the experience of mailing your tax returns after dark, you'll need to make the trek to the

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April 13  |  By Doug Parry
Boat racers took to the water Saturday for the Kenmore Hydroplane Cup.

The event was held on the north end of Lake Washington at the Kenmore Boat Launch and Log Boom Park. Competitors raced one or two boats at a time up the Sammamish River, around an oval course and back to the Kenmore Boat Launch. The racers sped past some rather imposing concrete bridge supports.

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April 10  |  By Jessi Loerch
I usually love trees. Except every spring, when I decide I'd rather pave paradise than live with one more second of seasonal allergies.

For a few weeks each March and April, I sound and feel like my head is full of cotton. In fact, it's stuffed full of tree pollen and, well, snot. During these weeks, I'm horrifically unproductive. It's hard to get anything done while constantly out of breath. I'm pretty sure my coworkers are wearing headphones just so they don't have to...

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April 3  |  By Doug Parry
You're letting yourself believe in the Mariners, aren't you? Longtime Seattle Mariners fans will remember the team once promoted itself with the slogan — and I am not making this up — "Anything can happen."

Those were the dark days of the early 1980s, when the best we could expect was the random chance that our team might luck into a good season. Well, that and a Kingbeer for less than five bucks.

Eventually we got a few good years and some playoff appearances. But sadly, since Edgar Martinez...

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March 31  |  By Doug Parry
Google Maps has turned itself into a retro arcade in time for April Fools' Day, with a fully playable Pac-Man game.

To play, go to any location on Google Maps and look to the bottom left corner of the screen for the Pac-Man icon. The screen then transforms itself into a video game, complete with Blinky, Pinky, Inky and Clyde. Use this link to play on Everett's streets.

You can do this for any city grid...

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March 27  |  By Doug Parry
We all have our superpowers. Superman can fly. The Hulk can smash. I have the uncanny ability to find free street parking.

Sporting events, concerts, you name it. Even in a crowd, there's a good chance I will find a free spot. I'll arrive as someone is leaving and swoop in for one of those precious spaces along the curb. What can I say? It's a gift.

I'm afraid those of us with this power will be sorely tested this summer at Lighthouse Park in Mukilteo. With...

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March 20  |  By Doug Parry
When big corporations hand out layoff notices, they say it's nothing personal. We all know that workers are just cogs in the machine, and sometimes the machine needs fewer cogs.

But when every cog in the state chips in to make the machine happy, we start to take the layoff notices more personally.

Boeing should be getting that message from Rep. June Robinson's bill that would roll...

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March 13  |  By Doug Parry
Do we need a woman president before a woman goes on the $20? I've been known to spend a little of my free time at the track, and it's always a good feeling to come home with a wallet full of dead presidents.

The thing about dead presidents is, they're all dudes. Yes, men are the Harlem Globetrotters of U.S. presidential elections. We're on a 226-year, 57-election winning streak.

Not that one has to be a president to land on U.S. currency. Alexander Hamilton, the face of the $10 bill, was never elected, but he was the...

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