We’ve got a solution for everything

Published 11:16 pm Monday, January 5, 2009

The Buzz is suggesting ways to kill two birds with one stone today.

Problem: Seattle has started using salt on city streets when it snows, but is concerned about the harm to fresh-water streams.

Problem: An Oregon town says it’s overrun by black-tail deer because residents are feeding them.

Solution: Salt the streets but have each Seattle family adopt a deer that can then be sent out to use the roads as salt licks.

Problem: Tim Eyman is back with yet another initiative.

Problem: The Milky Way galaxy is more massive than first thought, which may hasten its collision with the Andromeda galaxy.

Solution: Eyman’s enlarged ego soon will collapse on itself, creating a black hole that will restore balance to the universe.

Problem: Sales are down drastically for automakers.

Problem: The health-care industry is desperate for nurses.

Solution: Retrain the nation’s unemployed car sales work force as nurses. Just don’t let your nurse talk you into the undercoating when you go in for a colonoscopy.