My kids couldn’t believe I was really going to do this. Neither could my husband. No one remembered me ever doing this before.
It was simply a pair of shoes.
Not just an ordinary pair of shoes, these were high heels. Wedgies are what I called them when I was 16 years old. Maybe it was nostalgia that got the best of me when I saw these shoes return to fashion.
Baby boomers are prone to this lovesick feeling for weird things from the past that make us feel good, or groovy, or whatever.
I can’t figure out why these shoes took so long to return.
Where have you been all these years? They make you feel thinner, younger, happier and hipper. You name it, these shoes cure it.
Don’t laugh. I know there is something out there that just does it for you. For me, it’s these shoes.
I actually didn’t have the guts to buy the shoes at first. They are white with colored polka dots sitting on super high wedges. I used my trip to Hawaii as the perfect excuse to buy them. I reasoned to my husband that I could wear them to go to the pool.
He looked bewildered.
He was born and raised here in the Northwest and doesn’t really get the concept of a pool shoe.
That’s his problem. I needed pool shoes.
Once I had them on my feet, this feeling overcame me. I was overcome with thinness, hipness and my youth. I hurried off to buy more heels. A pair for work, a pair for date night, a pair because I was caught up in my shoe addiction.
I unpacked my new heels at home and tried to figure out how I could change my shoes four times a day to give them all a turn.
I made space for my beloved new pals and lectured all my sensible shoes on how disappointing they had been, as I shoved them to the deep end of the closet.
I got dressed and pranced around my living room, 5 inches taller. My daughters looked at me with that same bewildered look as my husband.
Only this time there were some words with it.
“Mom, we’ve never seen you wear heels. Where would you wear those?”
And then it occurred to me, my 17year-old girls had not seen me in heels. They had no idea how young, hip and tall I really was. Oh my gosh. How could this have happened? How could I have spent 17 years mommying and working and wifing and not spend a single moment in my beloved heels?
I always wondered how a woman could end up in Mom-jeans or the same haircut since 1982. Now I see how it happens. I lost track of my shoes. I let a part of myself step away.
I realized it was time for my husband and daughters to get to know the real inner me, a woman who loves to prance around in really high heels.
I know for sure that I’m not the only one. There are plenty of other women out there who want to dance in high heels like Tina Turner.
Just in case you are wondering about what would make a special Valentine gift, think shoes. I promise, they are absolutely romantic.
Sarri Gilman is a freelance writer living on Whidbey Island. Her column on living with meaning and purpose runs every other Tuesday in The Herald. She is a therapist, a wife and a mother, and has founded two nonprofit organizations to serve homeless children. Send e-mail to features@heraldnet.com.
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