CONCORD, N.H. – My standing mixer is my new hero.
Recently my month-old son has given me a whole new appreciation for this machine.
When we brought Parker home from the hospital it was with no shortage of advice from every doctor, nurse, grandparent, co-worker, neighbor, friend, online chat group and stranger on the street about tricks for soothing a crying baby.
Try the swing. No, the bouncy seat. Jiggle his bum. Set him on the clothes dryer. Sing to him. But only if you’re a man. Give him a bath. Try the radio, on static. Wrap him tightly in a blanket. Don’t wrap him. Turn on the oven vent. Drive him around, especially at 3 a.m.
Nice ideas. Too bad none has worked more than once.
So I decided that if we couldn’t console our son, we at least should console ourselves. And since nothing goes better with sleep deprivation and self-pity than fat and carbs, I decided to bake pizza.
While my screaming child sat in his car seat on the counter, I assembled pizza dough ingredients in the bowl of my electric mixer and flipped it on. There was the usual whirring of the motor. And nothing else. Parker was silent, sucking away at his pacifier.
Surely it couldn’t be that simple. I turned off the mixer. His eyes flickered open. On again. The eyes drooped.
OK, so it worked once. So did driving around the neighborhood at 3 a.m., but only once, just as everything else did. Thereafter he was just as happy to scream in the car, on the dryer, in the swing and under the oven vent.
So I decided to give it another shot. Time to bake some cookies and see whether the mixer had the magic touch. As luck had it, I’d recently received a copy of “The King Arthur Flour Cookie Companion” ($29.95). Perfect excuse.
I set the little guy on the counter next to my mixer. He started wailing, so I had to one-hand it. While rocking Parker in one arm I pulled together the ingredients for molasses cookies and an unusual batch that involved potato chips.
The moment of truth. I plopped Parker back into his seat and flipped the mixer’s switch. But for the slow thud-thud-whir of the dough and the beater, there was silence. Blissful silence.
This was big. These mixers should be sold at baby stores alongside the diapers and swings.
Curious whether others had discovered this miracle, I called company that made my mixer. They eventually stopped laughing.
“You are the first, but I love that story,” a company spokeswoman said. “I’ve heard the vacuum, the dryer, driving the car, but never turning on our standing mixer.”
And while the company does not officially endorse the use of their mixer as a child sleep aid, another spokesman said many people have told him that the machine’s paddle mixing attachment is a popular toy, especially when coated with chocolate.
“We don’t actually tell people to do that,” he cautioned. “But the kids will play with it, chew on it, throw it around.”
And the cookies? Not that it matters; I would happily churn cement in the mixer if that would buy an hour of peace. But for those keeping track, they were delicious. I just didn’t expect to be baking quite so many. At 3 a.m.
Soft molasses cookies
1cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter
1cup sugar, plus additional for dusting cookies
1/2cup molasses
21/4teaspoons baking soda
1teaspoon salt
11/4teaspoons cinnamon
11/4teaspoons ground cloves
3/4teaspoon ground ginger
2large eggs
31/2cups (143/4 ounces) unbleached all-purpose flour
In a large mixing bowl, cream together the butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Add the molasses while mixing at slow speed. Add the baking soda, salt and spices. Add the eggs, one at a time, beating well after each.
Scrape down the sides of the bowl, then mix in the flour. Cover the bowl and refrigerate 1 hour.
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Lightly grease (or line with parchment paper) two baking sheets.
Shape or scoop the dough into 1 1/2-inch balls. Roll each ball in sugar and place on the baking sheets, leaving about 2 inches between them. Bake the cookies for 10 minutes. The centers will appear soft and puffy. Cool cookies on the pan for 10 minutes, then transfer to a wire rack to cool completely.
Makes 44 cookies.
Crispy chip cookies
1/2cup vegetable shortening
1/2cup granulated sugar
1/2cup brown sugar
1/2teaspoon salt
1teaspoon baking powder
1teaspoon vanilla extract
1large egg
1cup rolled oats
1cup (41/2 ounces) unbleached all-purpose flour
1cup gently crushed plain salted potato chips
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Lightly grease (or line with parchment paper) two baking sheets.
In a medium bowl, cream together the shortening, sugars, salt, baking powder and vanilla. Beat in the egg, then stir in the oats and flour, mixing until well combined. Gently fold in the potato chips. The dough will be stiff.
Drop the dough by the tablespoonful onto the baking sheets. Bake for 15 minutes, or until the cookies begin to brown around the edges. Remove the cookies from the oven and transfer to a cooling rack.
Makes 24 cookies.
Recipes from “The King Arthur Flour Cookie Companion,” The Countryman Press
Talk to us
> Give us your news tips.
> Send us a letter to the editor.
> More Herald contact information.
