“Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2”: Why?
A follow-up to the 1999 mishap “Baby Geniuses,” “Superbabies” may quite easily put an end to any discussion of what is the worst theatrical release of 2004. The culprits are once again producer Steven Paul and director Bob Clark; the movie is so bad Sony Entertainment revived a long-dormant entity, Triumph Films, to release it, presumably to avoid putting the mothership’s logo anywhere in the ads.
“Superbabies” holds that infants have a language only they can comprehend, but forget as they get older. All those gurgles and coos seemingly add up to an ongoing commentary on life from the diaper set.
Scott Baio and Vanessa Angel play a couple who own an upscale day care center that has some connection to the one from “Baby Geniuses.” Their son, Alex, entertains his fellow rugrats by spinning tales about a legendary superbaby named Kahuna.
Jon Voight plays worldwide media mogul Bill Biscayne and, in a fantasy sequence, a goose-stepping East German army officer (don’t ask), both with a jaw-dropping oompahpah Teutonic accent that falls somewhere between Lawrence Welk and Arnold Schwarzenegger. Biscayne is plotting to take over the minds of the world’s children and Kahuna comes along to battle evil in a pre-school Spy Kids rip-off.
Kahuna is a septuagenarian (!?) forever trapped in the body of a 7-year-old. He got that way by accidentally ingesting a formula his scientist father had concocted and for the last 60-plus years has looked after the welfare of children everywhere. The super-empowered tyke operates out of a grotto beneath the letter H in the Hollywood sign, a nifty little hideout that looks like some forgotten FAO Schwartz outlet store after a big sale.
With a steady stream of “see ya, wouldn’t want to be ya” dialogue, this interminable disposable diaper commercial has the nerve to end with a “TV is rotten for kids” message.
“Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2” H
Another useless sequel: Legendary superbaby Kahuna battles evil worldwide media mogul Jon Voight.
Rated: PG for violence and rude humor.
Now showing: tk
“Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2” H
Another useless sequel: Legendary superbaby Kahuna battles evil worldwide media mogul Jon Voight.
Rated: PG for violence and rude humor.
Now showing: Alderwood, Everett Mall, Marysville, Pacific Place, Woodinville, Cascade.
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