Traveling without your children requires keeping guilt at bay

My husband and I recently celebrated our 14th wedding anniversary, which is a relief because Year 13 was very unlucky — for our wedding presents.

Our pots and pans developed deep grooves, making me wonder if I had inadvertently fed my family nonstick coating. Entertaining was difficult because I accidentally ground up one too many forks in the garbage disposal. Our sheets were threadbare. At least our china was in mint condition — because we hardly ever used it. (Remember that, brides, when you register.) Hopefully this year will be a kinder to our housewares.

To celebrate our anniversary, my husband and I sailed the Clipper to Victoria for a two-night visit. The kids stayed home for a grandma and grandpa vacation.

Our first day in Canada we watched the movie “Interstellar” at the IMAX theater. A major plotline was the pain of parental/child separation, which meant I left the theater shaking. I couldn’t call home to check on the kids without risking roaming charges on my phone.

Why hadn’t we gone to Seattle or Leavenworth? Why did we forsake our children for a different country?

We were childless, but it was difficult to leave parental guilt behind.

Thankfully, as the movie wore off it became easier to remember the “why” of the journey: periodic breaks from your children are priceless.

Victoria without kids was like a whole new city. When we took a 30-minute walk from the Inner Harbour up to Craigdarroch Castle, nobody stopped three times to visit a bathroom. At the Emily Carr exhibit at The Art Gallery of Greater Victoria, we could read all of the signs without anyone complaining. It was fun to be an adult instead of a parent.

That night at dinner we decided to live large and order cocktails. It was almost like we were celebrating four days of marriage, instead of 14. Except … newlyweds would probably have hunted for cooler souvenirs.

There was one thing I wanted to buy in Canada — one thing only — Children’s Tylenol with decongestant, in tablet form. I didn’t care if this turned me into an international drug smuggler. It would be worth it. I pictured my suitcase packed with meltaways: cherry, grape and bubblegum. In America you can only buy the cough syrup version, which my kids hate. But the last time we were in B.C. they still had chewable tablets. I was going to stock up for the future. Or better yet, maybe I’d encounter Trimetric strips, the Holy Grail of juvenile cold medicine.

But alas, all of that is now unavailable across the border too. I’ve never stood in a pharmacy and been so disappointed.

My husband, however, knew exactly what to do. He diverted my attention to candy. A few bites of maple fudge and I morphed back into a happy tourist.

Thank goodness for parental instinct. Even in a 14-year-old marriage, it comes in handy.

Jennifer Bardsley is an Edmonds mom of two. Find her on Twitter @jennbardsley and at www.heraldnet.com/ibrakeformoms and teachingmybabytoread.com.

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