What’s wrong with Barbie? For starters, she’s freaky

Modern moms really have to decide one way or the other about Barbie.

Is Barbie offensive to feminism or is she an innocuous toy?

If you don’t have a policy in place then you could be one Christmas away from accidentally vacuuming up really tiny shoes. Thanks a lot, Santa.

I wish I could give you what my own decision about Barbie will be, but I’m still hopelessly lost in confusion. That’s ironic, because one of my biggest beefs with Barbie is how confusing she is.

I don’t know why a $15 Barbie is objectionable to me, but a $100 American Girl doll made in China is A-OK. Maybe it’s because of the years I spent as a little girl playing with my Day to Night Barbie, only to grow up and realize that real women don’t wear fuchsia suits and pink spectator pumps to the office, even in the 1980s.

But really, of course, it’s because of that other issue about Barbie. When my son wanted to know what the big deal was, and why I didn’t buy more Barbie dolls for his sister, I only told him part of the truth. The last thing my 7-year-old wants to talk about is bra size.

“What’s the ‘big’ deal about Barbie?” I said to my son. “Well, I don’t like Barbie because she sends a message to young girls that being beautiful means having super-blonde hair.”

Because of course, Barbie’s hair color is her most prominent characteristic. Obviously.

But if I were to talk about measurements, I would mention that in real life Barbie would be 5-foot, 9-inches tall, weigh 110 pounds and have a bra size of 39FF. In real life, Barbie would be freaky.

When my sister was little, she preferred playing with her Barbie doll fully disrobed, and with Barbie’s head turned around backward. As the older, wiser one, I thought my little sister was crazy.

But then I saw my own daughter play with Barbie this way, and I had an epiphany. The naked, exorcist version of Barbie has a more realistic waist to bust ratio.

My sister wasn’t weird, she was a genius! Turn Barbie’s head around and she makes more sense.

To borrow a word from my second-grader, maybe I just need to “chillax” about the whole thing. I know lots of women who played with Barbie growing up, and they all turned out just fine. I’m one of them. Of course, I’ve always had this nagging feeling that my hair should be blonder. … I know that there’s something wrong with my feet too, because why else would high heels be so uncomfortable?

Right now we are choosing to bring only one Barbie doll into our home, but we are still having a lot of fun playing with a whole collection at Grammy’s house.

Besides, if we got rid of Barbie altogether there would be all sorts of other problematic toys to fill the void. Like the Cinderella figure in a strapless bathing suit that is floating around the playroom.

When I pointed out that one in passing, a friend of mine quickly shot back: “Don’t dirty up Disney for me. I grew up on that stuff.”

Jennifer Bardsley is an Edmonds mom of two and blogs at http://teachingmybabytoread.blog.com.

Talk to us

> Give us your news tips.

> Send us a letter to the editor.

> More Herald contact information.

More in Life

Provided by Bridges Pets, Gifts, & Water Gardens.
Discover where to find the best pet supplies in town

Need the perfect store to spoil your furry friends? Herald readers have you covered.

VW Jetta SEL is a sedan that passes for a coupe. Photo provided by Volkswagen U.S. Media.
2025 VW Jetta Offers Greater Refinement, Technology And Value

A Perfect Choice For Small Families And Commuters

2025 Land Rover Range Rover Velar (Photo provided by Land Rover).
2025 Range Rover Velar SUV tends toward luxury

Elegant styling and a smaller size distinguish this member of the Land Rover lineup.

Honda Ridgeline TrailSport photo provided by Honda Newsroom
2025 Honda Ridgeline AWDt: A Gentlemen’s Pickup

TrailSport Delivers City Driving Luxury With Off-Road Chops

Photo provided by Subaru.
Subaru Forester is all-new for 2025, a sixth generation

The enduring compact SUV is sleeker but doesn’t ditch its original rugged looks.

(Getty Images)
Stacked and packed: Best sub sandwich spots in town

Craving a delicious sub sandwich? Where will you go first? Let’s find out.

Pippin the Biewer Terrier sits in the lap of her owner Kathy West on Monday, May 20, 2024, at West’s home in Marysville, Washington. (Ryan Berry / The Herald).
Top 3 pet grooming places in Snohomish County you’ll love

Looking for the perfect place to treat your furry friend? We have the answer for you.

Children fish in the water and climb near the renovated boat launch at Kayak Point Regional County Park on Friday, June 14, 2024, near Stanwood, Washington. (Ryan Berry / The Herald)
Reconnect with nature: Best campgrounds and RV parks to explore

Herald readers voted the top three spots for your next outdoor adventure

A couple stands on a large piece of driftwood in the wind at Mukilteo Lighthouse Park on Friday, Jan. 4, 2018 in Mukilteo, WA. There is a small craft advisory in effect until 10 pm Friday. (Olivia Vanni / The Herald)
Chasing sunsets: The best spots to watch the day’s end

Looking for the perfect place to catch a stunning sunset? Herald readers have you covered.

2025 Subaru WRX (Photo provided by Subaru).
2025 Subaru WRX replaces former TR trim with new tS model

The rally-inspired sport compact sedan is an ongoing favorite among enthusiasts

CX-90 With Three-Rows photo provided by Mazda USA Newsroom
2025 CX-90 Is A Stylish, Fun-To-Drive Package

Inline 4-Cylinder Hybrid Includes Plug-In Electric Option

Edmonds
Almost forgotten Tacoma artist exhibiting in Edmonds

Beulah Loomis Hyde died in 1983. A first-of-its-kind retrospective is open at Cascadia Art Museum until February.

Support local journalism

If you value local news, make a gift now to support the trusted journalism you get in The Daily Herald. Donations processed in this system are not tax deductible.