BY BRENDA SCHAFF
Deja vu, that’s what it is.
We grow up, then live our past through our children’s eyes. Or somehow can they learn from our mistakes?
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Brenda Schaff |
Going to my son’s football game made me realize how angry I really was, watching him pace back and forth, waiting for an opportunity for a split second to be put in the game, while the popular kids, the "super jocks," take a break and catch their breath.
Will it happen? The same gut-wrenching feelings, I remember at 16.
I have to remind myself I am now an adult, but my blood began to boil. They’re messing with my son now.
I watch play after play, while the coaches continue to put the super jocks in the game. The score rises higher and higher as the high school in Everett stomps its opponent.
At the end of the game, I have all the courage to run to the football field and tell off the coaches.
But on my way down, I catch my son’s wave to me. I stop and realize the embarrassment I almost invoked on my son.
So I raise my hand and wave. I’m so proud of you, son!
I remember three years ago, my former high school cross-country coach hugging me and whispering weakly "thank you" in my ear, one day before he died.
I also remember 22 years ago (like yesterday) the hugs I received when I ran well at Cascade High School in Turner, Ore.
And the rejection I felt when he refused to look at me after a poor run. And crying myself to sleep because I hated myself, because I did not meet my coach’s expectations.
Coaches can really help or ruin a person’s self-esteem.
It was better during the wrestling season for my son. He was undefeated on the junior varsity team, and everyone rooted for him.
He’s a senior this year, but he’s not going to turn out for football. He’s going to run cross country.
But it’s frustrating to me that grown men can have such a bad effect on a child.
Son, I hope you learn early in life who you really are.
When you put your jersey on and the coaches decide to recognize you or not. When you go home at night and lay your head to rest on your pillow, your importance doesn’t lie in the coaches’ hands.
Your strength comes from within, because you are always a winner!
Brenda Schaff has lived in the area for 20 years and has two boys. She still likes to run because it’s "good for the body and mind."
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