Families face difficult questions when family member is released from prison

It’s a trail of terror, with twists, turns and questions still unanswered. When I think of the nightmarish case of a slain Everett couple and the murders of two other men, one question looms large.

If I were a parent whose son had spent years in prison for serious crimes, would I open my door

? Would I welcome him into my home? Would you?

For more than a week, Herald readers have seen reports about David “Red” Pedersen and his wife Leslie “DeeDee” Pedersen. Mrs. Pedersen was found fatally stabbed in the couple’s home Sept. 28. The body of her husband, who had been shot, was later found inside his Jeep in an Oregon ravine.

Suspects in the killings are Red Pedersen’s 31-year-old son, David “Joey” Pedersen, and the young man’s girlfriend, Holly Grigsby, 24. They are in a California jail pending extradition to Snohomish County.

To make a horrific story worse, court papers show that Grigsby allegedly told detectives that the pair — both linked to white supremacist groups — later killed 19-year-old Cody Myers, of Oregon, because they surmised by his last name that he was Jewish. They are also suspects in the shooting death of a black man, 53-year-old Reginald Clark, found dead in his truck in Eureka, Calif.

Back to that chilling question — and an answer: Yes.

Yes, I am quite certain that under the same circumstances Red Pedersen faced, I would have invited Joey Pedersen — a son who had spent years in prison, a man investigators say threatened to kill a federal judge — to visit my home.

Herald writer Eric Stevick reported Thursday that Pedersen’s former neighbor in Arlington, John Olson, said “He wanted to be a dad to that kid,” and that the Pedersens paid train fare for Joey Pedersen to visit last summer.

This case, stunning in its wanton violence, forces us to also wonder about the meaning of family. One thing family means to me is forgiveness. If not your family, who will forgive you?

As generations of parents have learned in so many hard ways, grown children can make terrible, life-altering mistakes. What kind of parent abandons all hope? What kind of parent denies a son or daughter one more chance? What kind of parent will not forgive?

It’s a story as old as the Bible. In the Gospel of Luke, the story of the prodigal son tells of a father welcoming home — with a feast and open arms — a son who squandered his inheritance and lived in sin.

In today’s dangerous world, a parent’s trust may bring serious risk.

Joey Pedersen was released from an Oregon prison in May. Chad Lewis, a spokesman for Washington’s Department of Corrections, said Thursday that inmates’ families are generally encouraged to keep up contact during incarceration.

Research shows that offenders who get regular visits from family are less likely to commit a violent infraction. It’s part of prison safety as well,” Lewis said.

“We’ve got examples of offenders whose families are visiting all the time, to those whose families have largely disowned them — and everything in between,” he said.

It’s “case by case” whether there are dangers for a family upon an inmate’s release, Lewis said. “In some cases there might be security concerns with the family. They may have been a victim themselves. There is no one answer,” he said.

Lewis has seen newly released people greeted by children holding balloons, but also those with no one meeting them but a community corrections officer.

“One of the things we try to do is reduce the likelihood that they’re released to homelessness. That’s not just a favor to the offender. It’s for public safety,” Lewis said. “They get $40 gate money. That won’t get you a hotel.”

Lewis said that in Washington, 97 percent of inmates eventually get out, and that about 60 percent do not come back to prison.

Imagining myself in the shoes of Red Pedersen before his son’s visit, I think I would hide my wallet. I would not leave prescription drugs around. I would expect a challenging discussion of hate based on skin color or religion.

I would be wary, but I would open the door to a long-lost son.

What parent wouldn’t?

Julie Muhlstein: 425-339-3460, muhlstein@heraldnet.com.

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