Laura Herman is an attorney with a state agency. Law school brought a midlife career shift for the former Marysville City Council member. It wasn’t the biggest change that happened when Herman was 50.
Herman, 63, is a transgender woman.
“I’ve been living my life as me for quite a long time,” said Herman, who served on the Marysville council 1992-1997 and now lives in Skagit County. “Life is good. I love being myself.”
It felt absurd and invasive to call her recently and ask about using public restrooms. I did it because of the legislative fracas over a state rule that allows transgender people to use public bathrooms and locker rooms consistent with their gender identity.
Created by the state Human Rights Commission, the rule took effect in December. On Feb. 10, the state Senate voted 25-24 to reject a bill that would have repealed it. Although the rule survived, the fight might not be done.
In Olympia on Monday, the issue drew demonstrators on both sides. And on Wednesday, Joseph Backholm launched a campaign committee called “Just Want Privacy.” The aim is an initiative that would roll back the bathroom rule. Backholm, executive director of the Lynnwood-based Family Policy Institute of Washington, did not return a phone call Thursday.
In the announcement, Backholm said that before an initiative is filed, the campaign needs to raise $100,000 and find 1,000 volunteers to gather signatures. He described the effort as “truly a case of the people versus the special interests.”
Talking with Herman, I heard a person — not a special interest. She has her thoughts on what she calls “the transgender bathroom fuss,” but isn’t a vocal activist in the debate.
“Sadly, the legislative bills introduced in a number of states are a red herring that addresses a non-issue by appealing to prejudice and fears,” said Herman, adding that such bills incorrectly associate transgender people with predators. “If somebody is doing inappropriate behavior in a restroom, there are laws to deal with that,” she said.
“Transgender people who have gone through the sort of transition I have are usually very, very nervous about going to a restroom,” Herman said. “All they want to do is have a safe, private place to go to the bathroom.”
Herman, who has always lived in Western Washington, said knowing she was meant to be female is “something I’ve been aware of my entire life.”
“That’s not an uncommon story. I made the best of a bad situation for a lot of years,” said Herman, who prefers that her former name not be used.
Much of Herman’s career was spent as executive director of a nonprofit related to the building trades. Approaching 50, Herman knew it was time to move on professionally and personally. “The tension of not living as myself was too much,” she said. While planning her transition, she sought advice from a career counselor. And she knew it wasn’t the right time to be in the public eye on a city council.
During year two at the University of Washington School of Law, Herman underwent transition surgeries in Scottsdale, Arizona. Today, some health insurers cover transition procedures. That wasn’t the case for Herman. “It was very expensive,” she said.
After law school, it wasn’t easy to find work. “An awful lot of transgender people are still struggling on the employment issue,” she said. At first she worked in retail for $8.50 an hour.
In time, she landed legal work with a state agency in Olympia, where she lived for seven years. Now doing that work in Mount Vernon, she’s happy to be north of Seattle again. No longer an elected official, she is active on her church leadership council.
I was nosy enough to ask a few more questions. What are her thoughts on Caitlyn Jenner? The former Olympic athlete Bruce Jenner famously became a transgender woman last year.
“Even I have a hard time identifying with such a well-known and financially well-off public figure,” she said. “Not to criticize Ms. Jenner — she has shown a lot of courage — but our perspective on the world varies. A lot of folks are dealing with real challenges, struggling to survive and get a job.”
Herman doesn’t have a partner just now. She lives with a good friend and her cat. She is blessed with friends and a supportive family.
“You never know when you’re dealing with an issue of this sort whether your family will be supportive until you’re really out there — pun intended,” Herman said. “It was difficult news for my parents. They both really did quite well with it. Not everybody has that good fortune.”
Herman shared one restroom experience.
“The first time I went in a women’s room, it was during a picnic at Peace Arch Park at the border. I needed to go to the restroom and I was scared. Finally one of my friends realized I was having a little bit of a moment,” Herman said. She recalled the woman saying “We’re going to the restroom.”
“I’m pretty tall, and she was not quite 5 feet. She dragged me in there and stood guard outside the stall. In retrospect it was pretty funny. At the time, I really appreciated that support,” Herman said, remembering that kind friend.
“We’re just trying to live our lives, just like everybody else,” she said.
Julie Muhlstein: 425-339-3460; jmuhlstein@heraldnet.com.
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