As a former high school principal, Fred Poss has heard his share of threats and obscenities.
They weren’t necessarily from cranky teenagers.
“I have had parents threaten to come down and shoot administrators,” said Poss, now deputy superintendent of the Mukilteo School District.
Teachers and principals in the Mukilteo district could soon have a new tool for dealing with angry parents. The Mukilteo School Board is considering adopting a “civility” policy that outlines steps schools can take if someone gets verbally abusive.
The Marysville and Monroe school districts are among those that also have looked at the issue.
“It’s not acceptable to stand in an office at a school to shout obscenities and curse you out,” Poss said.
Middle and high school administrators raised the issue, but there was no single incident that led to considering a policy, Poss said.
“Some principals would report two to three incidents a year, and some 20. It varies by the school or the level,” Poss said.
Mukilteo studied similar policies from other districts, including Mercer Island and Deer Park, north of Spokane.
Mukilteo’s proposal basically says staff will treat parents and others with respect, and expect the same in return. Poss said it isn’t intended to deprive anyone of their right to freedom of expression, but aims to maintain a safe, harassment-free workplace.
Under the proposal, any school visitor who is disruptive, threatening or verbally abusive can be told to leave the campus. If they persist, teachers and administrators can tell them that the meeting, conference or telephone conversation is over and request them to leave or hang up.
If they refuse, police can be called. Restraining orders may be sought.
Terry Brandon is a former superintendent in Deer Park and Pomeroy, which both have civility policies.
“It’s not a matter of you are having a tense situation and you pull out the policy and say, ‘You have to talk nice to me,’ ” Brandon said.
Just pointing out that there is a policy usually diffuses heated conversations, said Brandon, who is now Mukilteo’s executive director of elementary education.
The Monroe School District last fall discussed revising its policy to better follow up with parents and guardians who have crossed the line.
School principals and other administrators listen to complaints from upset adults, “but sometimes they’re just not content,” Mike Murphy, executive director of educational programs, said at the time.
“They’ll do what they think is right, like barge into a classroom or lunchroom,” Murphy said. “Sometimes they’re under the influence of alcohol or drugs. Sometimes they’re just under the influence of life – lost a job, had a bad day, the water heater broke down.”
Like all schools, the district has a standard trespassing notice it gives adults who violate policy. “But we really don’t go any further than that,” Murphy said.
The question centers on how to be hospitable while being firm, he said.
Often, problems can arise because parents don’t understand how to contact staff within the school system, said Gail Miller, the Marysville School District’s assistant superintendent.
A panel of principals and parents is determining how to better communicate with parents about how they can be involved, be it serving on committees or volunteering in other ways. The work follows a new policy that encourages family involvement.
“In my mind, I guess it’s a prevention in some ways for where we sometimes end up with parents (who get upset) because they don’t feel they’re being heard or taken seriously or that they don’t have a role,” Miller said.
Marysville Superintendent Larry Nyland described a balancing act between accepting criticism and keeping things civil.
“I think every school district looks for that golden mean in terms of wanting to welcome the hundreds of parents and volunteers who are there to help, or even be the voice of loyal opposition, but at the same time wanting to maintain decency and order and keep the schools functioning for the large majority of staff and students.”
Reporter Eric Stevick: 425-339-3446 or stevick@heraldnet.com.
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