Have you heard the one about the poison-toting caterpillars?
It goes like this:
U.S. President George W. Bush had them sent to the carport of Venezuela’s Commandante Hugo Chavez. The intent was to assassinate Chavez through these changelings, but the commandante’s security forces were able to derail the plan.
What about the one having to do with a bronchial-blasting chemical warfare?
Apparently Bush sent a black cloud to hover over Chavez on his recent visit to Cuba. The cloud caused Chavez to develop bronchitis, and he had to cancel his many-hours-long Sunday talk show several weeks in a row.
Then there’s the one about free speech: U.S. citizens who criticize Bush go directly to jail.
The first two are so ridiculous that they must be jokes. Who would believe such incredible stories? The third sounds like the work of a conspiracy theorist or someone who’s landed on the wrong side of the Patriot Act. Still, it’s an unlikely scenario for the average American, and certainly not founded in fact (have you tuned in to any presidential debates recently?)
Yet there are Venezuelans who believe all three. I laughed when I heard the first two, but was assured that when Chavez suggested both scenarios, there were many Venezuelans who believed him.
When I interviewed a Chavista woman recently, she insisted that Americans should come to Venezuela to learn what free speech is.
“We can say what we want about Chavez. He allows it,” she said. “But if you say something bad about George Bush, you go to jail. Everyone goes to jail.”
When I’m interviewing someone, I make a point of leaving my own opinions at the door. But in this case, I was dumbfounded.
“That’s not true,” I told her. “I promise you, it’s not true.”
She did not relent. She said that Chavez has described how awful the conditions are for U.S. citizens, and she believes him.
Thousands of Chavistas gathered today to march across Caracas in a rally for their leader. From the city’s eastern neighborhoods to a stage set up in a main thoroughfare in the center, men, women and children wearing bright red t-shirts and hats, waving Venezuelan flags, gathered to show their support.
I showed up at about 8 a.m., the time the march was scheduled to begin. Considering Venezuelan time, I knew things probably wouldn’t get rolling until about 9:30 a.m.
I was so wrong.
By 11 a.m., none of the crowds scattered throughout the eastern neighborhoods had begun to move. Eager to see whether Chavez would show up for a scheduled speech, I began to move down the march route on my own. Along the way, huge crowds of Chavistas gathered near trucks blasting “revolution” songs or stages featuring “Bolivarian” musicians blocked traffic in the city’s streets.
The people weren’t marching, they were drinking.
Empty Polar Ice (a popular Venezuelan beer) bottles were scattered everywhere, crushed beneath bus tires and combat boots. Dozens upon dozens of tour buses were lined up throughout the city, having collected hordes of Chavistas from throughout the country and delivered them to Caracas for the event. The bus drivers stretched out on cardboard mats, flinging Polar Ice bottles and cans into the streets.
Great masses of red filled coffee shops and choked subway stations.
Later, a Venezuelan woman told me that she heard Chavistas at the march talking about the need to get rid of the U.S. and all the citizens in it.
The reason?
They believe Bush is using every tool at his disposal (black magic included, apparently) to try to kill their commandante, and that capitalist “imperialists” want to destroy Venezuela.
No one I spoke with at today’s march was sure when Chavez was scheduled to speak, but when he did, he would undoubtedly go on for hours.
He did.
And in an ironic twist, he had a name for his opponents:
“Clowns.”
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