NEW YORK — Actress Demi Moore is not alone. Close to a third of unmarried American woman in their 40s through 60s who date are going out with younger men, according to one of the most sweeping surveys ever conducted on the dating habits and sex lives of midlife singles.
Sex on a first date? Only 2 percent of single women in the age group approved, while 20 percent of the men were amenable. Frequency of sex? Sixty percent of the women and 45 percent of the men said they hadn’t had any in the past six months.
The survey, sampling the views of 1,407 men and 2,094 women ages 40 to 69, is being released today in AARP The Magazine, the flagship publication of the nation’s biggest advocacy group for Americans over 50.
According to the survey, 60 percent of singles ages 40-69 are women, a majority of them divorced. Forty-two percent of the men and 24 percent of the women had never been married.
Editor Steve Slon said he was surprised by the large portion of women who reported dating younger men — a trend recently glamorized by 40-year-old Demi Moore’s romance with actor Ashton Kutcher, 15 years her junior.
"There seems to be no stigma now for dating men a few years younger," Slon said. "Twenty years ago, women didn’t have the jobs. Today they have the jobs, they have the money, they can call the shots."
Among the men, 66 percent said they were dating younger women.
The survey’s authors said many of the trends were linked to the increased prevalence of divorce — a phenomenon which means the ranks of midlife singles are no longer dominated by widows and those who never married.
For men and women, the top reason for dating was to find fun and companionship. Only 11 percent of the men and 2 percent of the women cited sex as the main motive; only 10 percent of men and 7 percent of women cited marriage as the No. 1 goal.
"That reflects a very different mind-set from the past," Slon said of the relatively low yearning for marriage. "It reflects a comfort with oneself, a reluctance to get too entangled with someone else."
Other notable findings:
The survey’s margin of error, for questions asked of the entire sampling, was 2.4 percentage points, and slightly higher for questions directed at subgroups.
For men and women, the top reason for dating was to find fun and companionship. Only 11 percent of the men and 2 percent of the women cited sex as the main motive. For more statistics, see Page A6.
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