A swing and a #@%$!

In case you thought a baseball bat was just a big stick that, in a pinch, can also be used to pound tent stakes, players and coaches offer a little wisdom on the difference between hitting with wood and metal. Unfortunately, if you hit your hand while pounding tent stakes, it won’t matter what kind of bat you do it with.

Among the differences players describe is the crack made by a wooden bat versus the ping of a metal one. No one mentions another noise commonly associated with baseball bats: the tinkling of breaking glass that indicates someone’s about to be grounded for the rest of the summer.

Future bankers of America: Some kids go to tennis camp or science camp; others go to money-management camp. This sounds like a great idea, as long as you avoid enrolling your kids in any camp whose instructors are former business executives performing court-ordered community service.

Guess he made it to his goal weight: A suspect in Texas who had been losing weight escaped from jail through an air-conditioner vent Saturday. Officials say that from now on, inmates will no longer be allowed to read diet books or watch “The Shawshank Redemption.”

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