Everything’s better with butter

There’s no doubt about it: Unsalted butter blended with garlic, shallot and flat-leaf parsley makes burgers taste better.

And that’s not all: Garlic-herb butter also improves the flavor of cardboard, Vaseline, construction adhesive, your mother-in-law’s meatloaf, the KFC Double Down, etc.

Fond farewell: The Seattle Mariners began the post-Eric Byrnes era Tuesday night without any more punch at the plate, losing to Tampa Bay at Safeco Field.

Attention, M’s tchotchke collectors: The team will salute Byrnes’ contributions with an upcoming Eric Byrnes Botched Suicide Squeeze bobblehead night. That’ll be followed by Ken Griffey Jr. Seconds at the Clubhouse Buffet bobblehead night.

You’re pre-approved: Some employers require that their prospective employers have excellent credit ratings, even if their jobs don’t involve handling money.

That way, they can lay you off with a clear conscience because they know you can live off your credit card for a month or so.