So many fads, so little time. Let’s dive right into the pool of headlines.
•”’Dolphin-assisted’ birth: Natural or dangerous?”: Just to clear up any confusion, apparently some people, or at least one couple, (which does not a trend make) are choosing to give birth in the water with the friendly sea mammals, not the National Football League team, which indeed would be dangerous.
Meanwhile, a group of sea lion midwives joined the doula dolphins in politely asking the parents-to-be to go ahead and contact their human health care provider.
•”Engineering students use dance to solve problems”: Biomedical, mechanical and chemical engineering majors at Northwestern University are learning to swing dance in a for-credit class called Whole Body Thinking. The idea, educators say, is to help students known for left-brain thinking to use more of the right side of their brains. The students say the class is teaching them to think on their feet and work collaboratively with dance partners.
Which all sounds like a kind of science-y (yet affectionate) way of saying: We’re helping the nerds learn to socialize.
•”Robot servants that know what you want without being told”: A servant? That sounds more like the Soulmate 2000 series of robots.
”Exxon holders to vote on gay discrimination ban”: “We agree to rip off, er, sell gasoline and oil, and occasionally spill it, to everyone, and in all waters, equally,” the proclamation definitely did not read.
”Arvind Mahankali, 13, wins National Spelling Bee”: Since contestants now also have to define the word they spell, just for fun, the judges should be required to spell each contestant’s name after hearing it pronounced correctly by the contestant.
”Pink monster slugs discovered in Australia”: The bright fluorescent pink color is quite something to behold. Or not hold, rather. Our boring Northwest slugs must be totally camouflage-green with envy.
”Glow-in-the-dark cockroach among top 10 new species of 2012”: That doesn’t sound like a very survival-of-fittest development for insects that scurry around at night, but let’s not lose any sleep over it. Where are all the cute, new, furry species for the love of kitten videos?
”German clinic: Man had pencil in head for 15 years”: “So that’s where I put that,” the man may or may not have said.
“Burger King creates hands free Whopper holder”: You know, so you can set up in your car next to your hands-free phone deal.
”The hotel wake-up call gets personal”: Oh, settle down. Not that personal. After giving you a call, someone from the front desk will come to your room to make sure you are up. “The hotel team finds the service to be a bit nostalgic and a romantic throwback to a simpler time,” says Paul McKenzie, general manager of The Wolcott Hotel in New York.
Romantic? It depends on what one means by “romantic.” The nostalgia, we’ll buy. It is like being a teenager again to have an adult come to your room to make sure you are, in fact, out of bed. Whether this is actually desirable is thankfully left up to the guest.
•”More hotels offering free breakfast”: In bed? After your personal wake-up call? Since some people find that a bit nostalgic and a romantic throwback to a simpler time that never existed.
”Boy, 10, finds $10,000 in Kansas City hotel room”: Now there’s an ammenity. (“Thanks for staying with us.” “No, thank you!”)
”Scientists fear female libido booster too effective”: How nostalgic of them.
Define and spell random words during conversation this week, using your dolphin voice.
Carol MacPherson: 425-339-3472, cmacpherson@heraldnet.com
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