More cowbell

More cowbell

After the Everett Silvertips were snubbed last year, Fox Sports Network has agreed to broadcast five Tips hockey games on FSN.

Here’s how to bring the full Tips experience to your living room: Decorate the riding lawn mower to look like a Zamboni to circle the front yard between periods. Set up a concession stand in the kitchen and charge yourself $7 for each beer. And soundproof your living room so your neighbors can’t complain about the sound of clanging cowbells.

  • Coffee Crisp bars? In response to last week’s attempted airliner bombing, Canadian officials have banned most carry-on luggage on flights from its airports to U.S. destinations. Among the few items that are allowed are bags containing “life-sustaining items.”

    For our Canadian friends, “life-sustaining items” unfortunately do not include back bacon, six-packs of Molson Canadian and Tim Horton’s doughnuts.

  • But they’ve got mermaids: With new laws taking effect regarding the dress and conduct at bikini barista espresso stands, the owner of one chain of stands says he’ll comply but claims that business has dropped off 95 percent at one stand where baristas are now fully clothed. “Nobody wants to buy coffee from a clothing stand,” said Bill Wheeler.

    Yeah, we wonder how Starbucks ever managed to stay in business.

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