Put on your tin-foil hat

The U.S. military is paying scientists to study ways to read minds. Apparently no one in the military watched “The X-Files.” Because if they had, they’d already know how this story ends. (Hint: it’s not good.)

Single female in search of husband. A portrait of a young woman might have been painted by Leonardo Da Vinci. Experts say the work was likely intended to attract a husband — not all that different from a posting on an online dating site. While the level of technology was different, we suspect human nature wasn’t. The painting likely takes off 20 pounds and makes the subject about 3 inches taller.

Stephen King, author and all-around genius, is trying out a new format for his work, a series of short videos. King’s the sort of guy who needs to be busy writing, he says. If he’s not, the pent-up ideas come out in dreams. So that explains his skill. In an effort to save himself from bizarre nightmares, he’s inflicting them on the rest of the reading world. Not that we mind. Except when we’re up at 2 a.m., convinced the Walking Man is outside the bedroom window.

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