We’ve got yakking to do

Two farmers in Virginia are breeding yattle — a yak-cattle hybrid — and hope to market the meat to health-conscious consumers.

Here are a few other virtues the International Yak Association (no, we’re not making it up) says yaks possess, besides making a more wholesome hamburger:

They’re good pack animals. A woman in Vancouver, Wash., could probably use one of those right now — her Subaru was crushed when a 44,000-pound metal silo broke free from a tractor-trailer and tumbled down an embankment to the street where the car was parked. A yak can’t do 70 on the freeway, but at least it can run away from falling objects.

They’re fun. If a guy in France can get a record deal because of a video of him dancing and rapping about kebabs, then a hairy horned bovine is a sure ticket to fame. Just record yourself singing a heartfelt Celine Dion song to your most mournful-looking yak, post it to YouTube, and wait for the record companies to call.

They’re docile and easily tamed. This sets them apart from many bosses, with whom communication can be difficult, notes financial columnist Michelle Singletary. If your job is raising livestock, though, that won’t be a problem: All you have to say is, “Yakety-yak, don’t talk back.”