What type of pruno do you serve with prison loaf?

Prison loaf is the new blech: Nevada’s Supreme Court is ordering the state’s prison authority to detail what inmates are being fed in “chef’s choice” dinners in which the ingredients aren’t readily apparent. The justices weren’t satisfied with a report from the state’s top health officer that the prisoners aren’t malnourished.

But the health officer’s finding that prisoners’ coats are shiny and their noses are warm and wet, gave some indication as to the ingredients.

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Get to work, kids: “Glee,” launches its final season tonight. Rachel returns to her old high school to learn that the glee club has been disbanded.

But this time it’s not Sue Sylvester’s doing. Glee club was canceled, as were all arts electives, so that students could spend the entire day in STEM classes.

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They still have to explain their thing for Jerry Lewis to us: Thousands of French citizens stood up to protest the massacre of the staff of satirical magazine Charlie Hebdo and two police officers in Paris, by taking to the streets and waving placards that read “Je Suis Charlie,” (“I am Charlie”) even as two suspects in the attack remained at large.

On behalf of American joke-writers everywhere, we’d like to take back every reference ever made to the French as “cheese-eating surrender monkeys.”

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