CHENEY – As the balls kept slipping through hands, bouncing off chests and landing helplessly on the Ford Field turf, the Seattle Seahawks’ tight end couldn’t help but get a sick feeling inside.
On Sunday, he called Super Bowl XL “one of the toughest” experiences of his career. He lamented how things could have gone differently. He wished he could have made the play to change the outcome.
This is a story about a Seahawks’ tight end. But it’s not about Jerramy Stevens.
While Stevens was struggling to hang onto the ball in the biggest game in franchise history, Itula Mili was dealing with a different kind of anguish.
For Mili, the Seahawks’ 21-10 loss to Pittsburgh almost six months ago was wrought with helplessness.
“When you’re standing on the sideline in a big game like that, you think: Man, I wish I could do something,” said Mili, who was inactive for the Super Bowl despite having a clean bill of health. “But I couldn’t.”
The 2005 season was memorable for most Seahawks, but some parts of it Mili would prefer to forget. Now, six months after concluding a season that saw him play in just two of Seattle’s 19 games, Mili is doing everything he can do to prevent being forgotten.
“I’m trying to come out here and remind them that, yeah, I’m still here,” Mili said after Sunday’s afternoon practice. “They know what I’m capable of doing. I’ve shown it.”
Mili, who still holds the franchise record for receptions in a season by a tight end (46 in 2003), is getting every opportunity to refresh the coaches’ memories. While Stevens continues to recover from offseason knee surgery, Mili is getting most of the work with the No. 1 offense.
“He’s got his health back, which is great,” offensive coordinator Gil Haskell said, referring to a digestive condition that cost Mili the starting job at the beginning of last season and eventually landed him third on the depth chart. “He’s a very, very good tight end, so we’re happy to have him. He’s healthy, he’s stronger and he’s running every play. That’s a plus for us.”
Mili might have a head start on the starting job, but his chief competition is due back sometime in August. Stevens could start practicing as soon as three weeks, leading up to the Seahawks’ second preseason game.
“I’m not really looking forward to it,” the 33-year-old Mili cracked of his ongoing competition with Stevens. “Jerramy’s a great athlete. When you get older, you’re not only trying to battle Jerramy Stevens but also Mother Nature. So I’m not really looking forward to battling him.
“But it’s been good. I’ve enjoyed the battles we’ve had over the years. I think it’s made both of us better over the years. It’s helped him get better as a younger guy coming up, and it’s helped me stay competitive. So I think it was a win-win situation for both of us.”
Mili held off Stevens, a first-round pick in the 2002 draft, for two seasons before dropping behind his younger teammate in 2004. That came after a well-publicized, financially-motivated stance that Mili took in the summer of 2004 in which the veteran tight end skipped minicamps while seeking a contract extension.
Two years later, Mili has regrets about that decision.
“That was one of those experiences,” Mili said. “If I could rewind time back again, I might have handled things differently. But that’s in the past. I don’t think about that anymore.”
Mili actually looked like he’d won the job back at last year’s training camp, but the digestive condition hospitalized him days before the season opener and left Stevens as the starter. Stevens put up career numbers (45 receptions, 554 yards and five touchdowns), while Ryan Hannam emerged as a consistent blocker and offensive threat. Because the Seahawks needed extra roster spots for special teams players, Mili was left inactive for 14 regular-season games and all three postseason contests – even though he was fully recovered by October.
“All my career, I’ve always been in there and always been playing. So it was tough,” Mili said. “It made me respect the game. It made me say, ‘Golly, I really, really love this game.’
“You can take these things for granted. And when you’re not playing, it’s like, ‘Wow, I actually do this for a living. This has got to be the best job there is.’ I saw a lot of things that made me want to play that much more.”
Mili’s motivation to get back on the field was evident at summer minicamps. He changed his diet – “I definitely cut out all the Hawaiian food,” the native of the big island said – and ran more sprints, then reported to minicamp “20 to 25 pounds” lighter than he had in previous years.
“He came back at the last minicamp in shape and he’s still in shape,” Haskell said. “But we’ve got to be careful with him. He’s the only (experienced) tight end (at camp). We can’t run him all day long.”
With his weight down and a chip on his shoulder, Mili feels like he could run all day.
“My body feels great out there,” he said. “I can really tell the difference.”
And what was all that hard work for?
“This moment right here,” Mili said after the second day of training camp practices. “Coming into training camp and being ready to go. Showing everyone that I’m ready to go. I have to show (the coaches) again how I do it.”
If Mili can show enough, maybe he’ll get another Super moment to prove something to the world.
And this time, Mili doesn’t want to be watching from the sideline.
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