The Mariners took a short break from their “How we gonna score today?” anxiety and held a little team-building exercise this morning: a ragball game on the half field at their spring training complex.
Lots of laughter, a little controversy, a six-run home run, some interesting rules interpretations, an in-game trade and Milton Bradley emerging as the victorious manager.
The final score? Not sure anybody kept track, although it was 7-2 Bradley before Mike Sweeney belted a six-run homer in the last inning to help the team managed by Chone Figgins come back.
This wasn’t about the score. It was about a bunch of guys taking a little time to laugh exactly one week before the regular season begins.
Here’s how it worked:
Everyone had to bat opposite their natural side (Ichiro batted right-handed, for example), and baserunners went from home to third to second to first and back to home. Veteran catcher Josh Bard was the umpire.
The pitcher for both sides was Mariners strength/conditioning coach Allen Wirtala, who threw “rag” balls, those baseball-sized balls that you see in youth games.
A few highlights:
Not one hitter took a first step out of the box going the proper direction, all of then starting toward the real first base before remembering to go the other way.
Batting from the opposite side didn’t keep the soft ball from flying over the fence about 200 feet away. Chris Woodward, Josh Wilson, Jack Wilson, Eric Byrnes, Ichiro, Franklin Gutierrez and Mike Sweeney homered.
After Josh Wilson’s homer, reliever Mark Lowe made like pitching coach Rick Adair and walked to the mound for a talk with Wirtala. Not sure what he said, but he dressed the part by pulling his pants up over his navel.
We all watched Bradley to see if he’d lose his cool. And, even though his team was doing all the scoring, he mustered up enough rage to stomp onto the field, pull first base … er, third base … out of the ground and throw it. Then he dissed a reporter after the game when asked if the manager was talking to the media.
Figgins inserted pitcher Jesus Colome as a pinch-hitter, and he delivered a single. But the opposition protested Colome’s eligibility and there was a discussion at home plate with Figgins showing his lineup card and other paperwork that seemed to confirm that Colome should be an eligible player. He was allowed to remain in the game, although Ken Griffey Jr. screamed from the other dugout: “But that’s a Dominican birth certificate!”
Gutierrez’s home run was disallowed because he “apparently” didn’t touch home plate. He did, but that would have taken the fun out of Figgins’ appeal.
Figgins and Bradley pulled a mid-game trade, Figgins sending Adam Moore to the other side in exchange for 7-year-old Tevin Griffey.
After Sweeney’s home run, he immediately called for a pinch-runner to help him in his home-run trot. Five of them left the bench and joined Sweeney as he circled the bases — Jose Lopez, Casey Kotchman, Ryan Rowland-Smith, Ian Snell and Felix Hernandez. Thus, a six-run home run. When they all reached the plate, they huddled for a moment of celebration, then toppled over like bowling pins.
Umpire Bard, who wasn’t above taking bribes, then delivered the bad news. He ruled it only a three-run homer.
Eric Byrnes stormed off the field in disgust, calling it a “mockery” of the game. Later, he told a couple of writers that “the game was rigged.”
Rigged for a few laughs, maybe. Wouldn’t it be nice if these guys have this much fun during the regular season? And score as many runs?
