Fantasy football is a guessing game. It’s that simple.
Even the fantasy experts – this one included – can’t tell you what’s going to happen before the 16 footballs fly each weekend in the NFL.
We can pretend and we can project and we can predict.
But ultimately we guess.
And when we’re right, we rejoice and we brag and we celebrate our genius.
That’s what this week’s column is all about.
Last week I went out on a limb and suggested that you bench some big-name guys, including Randy Moss, Jamal Lewis, Drew Bledsoe, Mark Brunell and Willis McGahee.
I thought I made a pretty good case. But I wasn’t the one who put myself out on a limb.
Not even close.
Late Saturday night an e-mail came from my new friend Dave, a 36-year-old fantasy football player from Camano Island.
Dave didn’t have the kindest things to say about my fantasy football prowess, suggesting in so many words that I know about as much about fantasy football as a boat captain knows about crossing the desert.
On virtually every point – McGahee being the lone exception – Dave thought I was out of my mind, and he let me have it pretty good.
“Victor Balta shame on you! Man, I don’t want to bust your chops too bad and I am sure you are a great guy but you don’t know much about fantasy football! I really don’t want to hurt your feelings but …”
Dave went on in detail about Moss, Lewis and Brunell, how they were each going to blow up because they were facing horrible defenses.
“You are a great writer and do a good job writing about television programs, etc., but you really need to do a TON more research before you attempt to write an article about fantasy football. If people actually follow your advice this weekend they may find themselves very frustrated.
“I hope I don’t sound mean and I don’t ever write to a newspaper columnist but you were WAY off on your advice. If you really do believe this stuff maybe you have room in your league for me next year!?”
Well, at least Dave was right about one thing: I really am a great writer and I do a heck of a job covering television in my column that runs Mondays and Thursdays on the A&E page.
Moss had seven catches for 74 yards and didn’t score.
Brunell passed for 156 yards and one score. (Dave later told me he actually picked up Brunell just to prove me wrong!)
Lewis rushed for 17 yards and caught three passes for 23 yards.
Fortunately, Dave is a better sport than he is a fantasy prognosticator. He allowed me to use his comments in today’s column.
Here’s one of my favorite lines from the mea culpa he sent Monday morning:
“You are not going to believe this but I think my son may have got on my computer this weekend and insulted your fantasy football intelligence!
“Wow, was I ever wrong. I am sure sorry and I will have ketchup with my crow please. How about you just keep doing what you are doing and I will make sure to NOT try to make a living making fantasy football predictions.”
Sure, I’m poking fun, but that’s what fantasy football is all about.
It’s the dialog, the trash talking, the guessing game and the raising your arms like Rocky at the top of the steps in front of the Philadelphia Art Museum.
I won’t win ‘em all. None of us will.
But it never hurts to take some time and highlight the reason we all do this. No matter how much money may or may not be on the line in your fantasy league, it’s all about bragging rights.
I had them this week.
We’ll see who gets them next week.
Columnist Victor Balta: 425-339-3455 or Balta@heraldnet.com.
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