ASANGA

SHORELINE — Every Sunday morning at the monastery co-founded by his grandfather, 5-year-old Asanga Sakya would sit motionless while his father fidgeted — straightening his son’s magenta top robe or quietly whispering words of praise.

Father and son, both crown princes in the Sakya order of Tibetan Buddhism, will soon be separated in order to preserve the family’s heritage.

“He is like a kid at home, jumping around, playing board games,” said Ani Sakya, 48. “But when he is at the monastery, he is very serious; he knows when he can be serious and when he can be a kid.”

The Sakya family’s royal blood line has been unbroken since 1073 and the sons of the family are typically raised by Buddhist teachers and leaders to continue the line. Asanga Sakya left the United States to attain the type of education his father and uncles were denied when the family fled Tibet in 1960, after the Chinese takeover.

In exile, the family settled in Seattle, which they presumed would be temporary until they could return to a free Tibet.

“We were all optimistic that we would return, it is now 2005 and we are still waiting,” said Ani Sakya. “It has gotten to the point where we realize that we need to make other plans, like having our son educated in a more formal setting with a tighter Tibetan community.”

Asanga Sakya, his father and mother, Chimey, 3-year-old sister, Aloki, and paternal grandmother, left Seattle on April 14 to travel to the Tharlam Monastery, in Kathmandu, Nepal.

Asanga Sakya will begin his studies at the monastery to become a leader not only of the Sakya order of Tibetan Buddhism, but a leader of all schools of Buddhism. Asanga Sakya’s parents want their son to study as a nonsectarian Tibetan Lama so he will one day be respected by all Tibetans. He could one day be leader of Sakya Buddhists throughout the world.

The Sakya branch of Buddhism balances meditative and scholastic teachings, as well as being a straight blood line from father to son.

Although Asanga Sakya is young, beginning his studies at the monastery at the age of 5 is a custom in the family. It is considered preferable because he is not an infant needing his mother’s care, yet has not learned too much. Born on May 1, Asanga Sakya will celebrate his sixth birthday with his family in Nepal.

“I will miss all the good things,” Asanga Sakya said after much consideration. “I like to do lots of things, I like to do prayers, like to do my reading and like to do my writing.”

The family says the decision to send their only son to Nepal was based on his personal nature and characteristics that are somewhat unusual for a young boy. Asanga Sakya has a strong interest in religion, prayers and wants to learn about the Buddhist culture, said his father. He has been homeschooled and studied twice weekly with his grandfather, Jigdal Dagchen Sakya, a Tibetan Lama. At 5, Asanga Sakya already asks questions about why the communists overtook Tibet.

“Because of his interest and the opportunity and his right as a lineage holder, we are providing for the best he can have,” Ani Sakya said. “He wishes to do this, he knows where he is going.”

This is not Asanga Sakya’s first trip abroad and he has been asking when he will return to Nepal. Two years ago, the family traveled to India for a pilgrimage. They visited holy sites, as well as the Tharlam Monastery, which is located in a religious community 20 minutes outside of Kathmandu, Nepal.

“As a small child, he understood the value, the significance of the sites,” Ani Sakya said. “He knows these things.”

On that trip, a special ceremony was held for Asanga Sakya, who met the Dalai Lama in a private audience. The boy recited a long-life prayer, amazing the Dalai Lama that a 3 year old could recite the prayer, Ani Sakya said.

Because Asanga Sakya is a crown prince, he will have his own room, attendant and tutor at the Tharlam Monastery. He will be separated from the other boys his age who study in larger settings to become monks. Servants will bring him food and he will not be expected to complete mundane tasks, such as chores.

“He will never have to do laundry, pick up books, clothes, clean, cut the lawn,” Ani Sakya said. “Although he likes to do these kinds of things, he won’t be asked; it will look funny.”

In preparation for the cultural transition, Ani Sakya has advised his son what will be expected of him. Faithful people, both old and young, will ask him for a blessing if they are ill or unhappy, or requesting that he name their child. He will be expected to touch their head with either a rosary or his hand and if they are ill, he will blow in their eye or their throat, which they believe will heal them.

“I have been lately telling him ‘Do you understand, Asanga, that besides teaching and studies, some lay people will be coming to you?’” Ani Sakya said. “Even though you are a child, they will be asking you to name their children.”

Ani Sakya was a few years younger than his son when his family fled Tibet in 1960. The family spent a year in India before coming here. His older brother remembers the exodus and escaping over the mountains, although Ani Sakya has no memory of the event.

“I don’t remember coming over the mountains, the escape,” Ani Sakya said. “The older Tibetans say it is better I don’t remember.”

The Sakya family was invited here in the 1960s by Robert B. Ekvall, a scholar who spoke a dialect of the Tibetan language at the University of Washington. He offered the family a grant in exchange for information about their culture.

Prior to Tibetans fleeing their country, Tibet maintained a policy of isolation, Ani Sakya said. Westerners realized there was an opportunity to gain information, he said, and academics were curious. A book was eventually written, entitled “A Tibetan Principality,” by Ekvall and C. W. Casinally.

Had Ani Sakya’s parents not been forced to flee Tibet in 1960, he likely would have become a monk, as the second oldest son of a Sakya Lama. If his older brother had children, they would have been heir to the family’s lineage.

Ani Sakya’s brothers have also struggled with the decision to send their children to either Nepal or India for formal training, and one of his younger brothers previously sent a son to study in India, although he did not go directly to the monastery, but lived with his maternal grandparents.

While the family waited to return to Tibet, Ani Sakya and his four brothers were educated in public schools in Seattle. Ani Sakya later spent one year in India in 1974, where he studied in a monastery and took vows. He became a lawyer and worked for the Tibetan government-in-exile, later spending five years as chief legal counsel, where he met his wife. He requested a temporary leave of absence in 1997 and has since been practicing law in Seattle.

The family monastery, Sakya Monastery of Tibetan Buddhism, in the Greenwood area, was co-founded by Ani Sakya’s father in 1984. His father bought and converted several houses and eventually remodeled an old Baptist church with a flat roof, like Tibetan monasteries.

It has been a challenge to retain their culture, Ani Sakya said, and as a result, the family has become Americanized. They celebrate the Tibetan New Year but also Christmas, Easter, Hanukkah, and the Fourth of July. It is the everyday distractions here that would make it difficult for Asanga Sakya to stay and train as a Tibetan Lama, his father said.

Nevertheless, Chimey Sakya said her son will miss the Western culture to which he has grown accustom.

“He told me, ‘Mama, can you tell Santa when Christmas comes to mail my gifts to Nepal?’” Chimey Sakya said. “I said ‘I will make sure Santa gets his address and mails him things there.’”

When Asanga Sakya is a teenager, he will have the option of attending a Buddhist university. If he does not want to be a Lama and would rather study another profession, he is welcome to do so, his father said.

But Asanga Sakya is expected to eventually return to Seattle and teach at the Sakya Monastery. He will also likely travel throughout the world with his teachings.

For the first few years, Asanga Sakya’s family will visit him in Nepal, but only once year to avoid interrupting his studies.

Asanga Sakya’s parents say they are experiencing a mixture of excitement and sadness. They realize their selflessness may ultimately preserve the family’s culture in future years, and their loss is a gift to Sakya Buddhists who may one day look to Asanga Sakya as a leader.

“If I wanted to be selfish I would keep him here, I would take him to Mariners games, Sonics games or hiking,” Ani Sakya said. “I would love to watch him grow; but that is selfish.”