Pencils out for the new math quiz

Published 11:05 pm Friday, March 20, 2009

Spelling counts: With the Senate’s approval Friday a bill that would eliminate the math WASL as a requirement for high school graduation now goes to the governor.

But high school students aren’t getting off that easily; lawmakers plan to replace the math WASL by requiring students to find nearly $9 billion in cuts and new revenue to balance the state budget.

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Bonus? Who me? Insurance giant and bailout poster child AIG has sent a memo to employees concerned about the executive bonus backlash that recommends they avoid wearing the company logo and travel in pairs at night.

In extreme cases, AIG executives will be invited to join the Federal Reserve’s Bonus Baby Relocation Program and be given new identities, minimum-wage jobs with Wal-Mart and a 1994 Geo Metro.

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Spoiling our fun: Hoping for a “peaceful, non-annoying society,” Miss Manners says she’s creating a new set of etiquette guidelines based on the 110 rules of civility attributed to George Washington.

We’re going to have trouble with No. 65: “Speak not injurious Words neither in Jest nor Earnest. Scoff at none although they give Occasion.” All respect due to the Father of Our Country, but he never had to get a bonus back from an AIG exec.